Pop psych analysis of players' decks...

W

Whimsical

Guest
<Whimsical comes home to the office after a hard day of trying to take over the known multi-verse...> Must have a load of patients by now ... the backlog should be murder ... Eeeeeekkkkk!!!

<a single ubiquitious tumbleweed drifts by when the door is opened, a dusty Gomorran wind sighing by>

Wow. Ghost town, er office. No offense to you, mister hypnotized specter... Oh, no!!! I've been TOO good at my work! <sob, sob> I cured everyone and now no one needs my clinic!!! Oh, woe is me...

A shrink without patients. Yick. <sighs, rolls up sleeves, and starts tackling the mogg infestation in the basement> Maybe I should open a resort next time? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... ;)
 
D

Duel

Guest
Doc, help me! I'm obsessed with blue green bounce-beatdown! Ahhh! It doesn't even win!
 
A

Apollo

Guest
I like to play with an Orc deck. I also like a green/red deck with tons of Elves and a few burn spells (Elves with Flamethrowers).
 
T

Thrash Golem

Guest
ok..

I have a pestilence deck with death pits, and bold white knights.


I also have a deck with stampeding wildebeests and deranged hermts.


Also i got this brawler deck with land kill


and a fungus deck. (looks at feet)


i already heard the one for burn.


doctor you've got to help me!!
 
D

Darsh

Guest
I have this gravepact deck with only 1 gravepact! It's based on having creatures die and contains Attrition, Sengir Vampire, Nightmare, Breeding Pit, Crovax the Cursed, Bad Moons, a few walls and shadow creatures oh and four Sadistic Glees.

HELPME!
 
H

HumanError

Guest
I love old school Necropotence! I love it! I love the slow and steady build to power, and then the massive 25-point Drain Life climax at the end!

HELP MEEEEE!!!!!
 
W

Whimsical

Guest
Okay, you Mogg Flunkies! Move the tables and umbrellas over there ... you! Yes, you Skittering Horror you! Get the bar ready, pronto! And somebody tell that Force of Nature to move the beach front up here!!! <dusts hands and walks into the portal leading to the clinic>

Eeeeeeeekkkkkkkkk!!! More patients?! <sticks head back in portal> Tell everyone we're canceling the renovations!!! <grumbles, groans, and distressed roars erupt from the portal> Jeez, put a sock in it! Act like the minions you guys are supposed to be and move all the stuff back!!! Hup, hup, hup!!! <closes portal with a wave of the hand>

Darn, and I was so looking forward to put a resort here. :)

The doctor is in! No refreshments this time, fellow planeswalkers. All my flunkies are back in the homeplane selling all the resort stuff... <glares at the Eater of the Dead wandering by the waiting room> And no, those corpses don't count as a light snack! Move it or lose it, munchy! Where was I? Oh, yes...

Ah, yes. Mister Duel sir! You want me to look at your deck again? Naughty, naughty boy... ;) Very well. Blue/Green bounce/beatdown, you say? Hmmmmm... <takes a close look at Duel's deck and gasps> Uktabi Orangutans! And you like to bounce them up and down! Oh, my... this is disturbing indeed. <scribbles out a phone-number> Here. Call my friend the Elvish Ranger... I'm sure you'll like her FAR better than the Orangutans... :D

Next!

Welcome, mister Apollo sir! C'mon... be a nice mage and pull out your deck for the doctor to ogle at ... ahem, examine. ;) This is a pork deck? No wonder it's so clumsy. :) Granted it's a hot (what with all the cheese) thing ... but I think you need more finesse with this deck. ;) At the very least, the deck should know WHO to hit on... :D

Next!

Mister Golem sir! Welcome back! Wow ... lots of decks you have today. The Black/White Pit Pestilizer sounds interesting ... and it has BOLD white knights? You must like poking other decks... The way you describe this deck, if I were a man and I saw you lug this deck into the locker room ... I'd learn how to pick up soap with my feet on the fly... :D The fungus though ... <glances at his feet> I'd advise you to stay away from any thallids and/or saprolings in the near future.... ;)

Next!

Hiya, mister Darsh sir! A suicide black deck? But I've already done that analysis ... oh, wait. The OTHER suicide black deck. I see... <fires off a lava burst at the Eater of the Dead offering Darsh a femur> Bad munchy! Back to business... Considering you like to play in the graveyard and all with this deck... <scribbles out the same phone number given to Duel> Here. She's an Elvish Ranger and even though she's not dead ... I think you'll have a blast with her. Now stop playing with the corpses, you odd-fetished mage you... :D

Next!

Oh, a new client! Welcome mister Human Error sir! <listens to him describe his deck and bursts out laughing> If you said you had City of Solitude there, I'd have said you'd better stop playing with yourself off the bat. As it is... the way you say it, I can tell you enjoy playing with your deck. Live long and suck, mister Human Error sir! :D

'Till next time!
 
D

Duel

Guest
You know how long I've been looking for her phone number?
This may come as a shock to you, but she's unlisted...
 
A

Apollo

Guest
Hey, Whimsical refuses to give out her age...

It would be hilarious if she's 80 or something:)

[me]ducks and covers[/me]
 
W

Whimsical

Guest
Elvish ranger's phone number is unlisted? Funny ... she was nice enough to give to moi when I asked. Of course, it could've been because I wasn't slavering over her at the time I asked unlike you men ... ;)

And I'm not 80!!! I'm in my early twenties!!! <grabs a mallet and start whacking birdy on the head> :D
 

Killer Joe

New member
As you all know, by now, I have this signature deck called "Erratic-Spikes" (U/G/W), it's main purpose is to be played in multi-player games only and is a very non-conpicuios kind of deck. I play a land, I eventually play an Erratic Portal, followed by a Spike Weaver or Feeder, I counter non-creature stuff, I use Wrath of God when the tables are turned against me, I use Gaea's Blessing to do it all over again if I have to, I use Propagandas to make people think twice about attacking me, and then, I eventaully have Board Control. I cast Phelddagrif and win. The problem is: I am usually the only reason why our multi-player games take an hour and a half or more to play. I personally love it, but the others don't.
Dr. Laura said that this deck is a direct reflection of my personality, what do YOU say, Dr. Whimsical?
 
A

Almindhra

Guest
It says you're a bad magic player pure and simple...You should keep trying harder...Maybe then you'll be as good as, *pulls out a pic of that sweet, divine Almindhra*, Almindhra...Your deck is too slow and can be beat by any Replenish deck out there in multi-player...Keep trying there stumpy...

*runs out of Dr Whimsy's office before anyone can catch her*
 

Killer Joe

New member
You're so slow, Mold could catch you. Now don't make me have to travel all the way to up state New York to show you the power of the "Erratic-Spike" deck.
Stumpy, huh?
DUkey and Mindi sittin' in a tree
k-i-s-s-i-n-g
first comes love, then comes marriage
<and something something> baby carriage.
 

Spiderman

Administrator
Staff member
Yellowjacket: "Then comes a baby in a..."

Almindhra: Surely not ALL of us?! Just Yellowjacket, right? :)
 
A

Almindhra

Guest
Just all who sing that stupid song about me and-...*shudders*...I can't even bear to say who...
 

Killer Joe

New member
What ever you do, DON'T feel sorry for Ally. She gives it out alot (I mean getting the best of folks), ask her about "Richie" and how she abused him to no end. And Me, too, she was relentless on me when I taught in her school. So don't feel bad for a master at insults :)
 
A

Almindhra

Guest
What?!...I befriended Ritchie...I even gave him that nickname...Everyone else was mean to him, I would stick up for him...I was his friend whe no one else was...And last year I played his music with him sometimes because he didn't know what was going on...

And I didn't pick on you...I just told you what was going on...I was honest...Thats all...I'm honest...I'm not a master of insults or anything.......Its just honesty...You see?...Yeah, honesty...
 
Top