Linux Troubleshooting Storm: A New Beginning (from the makers of Crapstorm)

Discussion in 'Games Run By CPA Members' started by turgy22, Aug 7, 2012.

  1. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    p ete will try to keep his capture well feetered, while instructing repete to fling pawn scum as he keeps a rear-guard as pete expresses his dislike of being the butt of a joke.
  2. turgy22 Nothing Special

    Day 4
    Time: 9:50 pm

    You are fighting a pair of foot soldiers.

    Round 2
    Ward goes for the foot punch. The soldier steps away.
    McGill takes a swing. The soldier ducks around it.
    Pikachu launches a thunderbolt, striking the soldier down.
    Pete fails to keep the last soldier feetered, however he does remain fettered. Repete keeps rear guard, but nothing else is approaching.

    The foot soldier continues to attempt escape from Pete's web.

    Status Updates
    One soldier remains.
    Ward loses 1 energy from his attack.
    McGill loses 2 energy from his attack.
    Pikachu loses 3 energy from his attack.
    Pete loses 1 energy while keeping the last soldier restrained.

    Safety Numbers
    Ward: 6
    Melkor's Ghost: 7
    Pikachu: 4
    McGill: 5
    Pete: 6
  3. rokapoke Man Among Gods

    "Maybe, since we've got one last soldier to face and he's restrained, we should see if he'll talk."

    McGill attempts to question the foot soldier to determine the soldiers' motives for attacking the elves.
  4. turgy22 Nothing Special

    Assuming McGill's question is, "Why are you attacking the elves?"...

    The soldier answers, "the elves sent for us to install plumbing in their burrow." He then continues to struggle to break free.
  5. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    Ward asks his misprinted magic 8 ball...

    What manner of plumbing requires a siege?
  6. turgy22 Nothing Special

    Ward turns the 8-ball over and reads the message: "Butter not tell you now."
  7. rokapoke Man Among Gods

    "Burrow? Don't they live in a tree?"
  8. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    I think these guys might be lying to us!

    Perhaps we should ask the elves about this?

    What do we do with him?

    Pete could inject him with digestive enzymes and then drink him.

    Ward, that's terrible!

    It is nature's way.
  9. turgy22 Nothing Special

    I'm curious to see if Pete had a plan on what he was going to do with his captured soldier, so I'll give him a bit more time to respond. Of course, if his answer isn't sufficiently amusing, then he'll get kicked in the head and the soldier will escape.

    Choose your next move carefully, DarthFerret.
  10. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    pete says, "sounds like a good idea to me, so if you don't hold still and answer our questions to our satisfaction, I will change your name to snack.
  11. turgy22 Nothing Special

    The lone soldier, still trapped in the web of deceit, remains unable to tell the truth about anything. And, to be honest, even if he weren't in the web, he wouldn't give you information anyway. So Pete will suck out his juices or whatever it is he had planned.

    Status updates and more story coming tomorrow.
  12. turgy22 Nothing Special

    Status Updates
    Ward gains 4 experience from the battle.
    Melkor's Ghost gains 9 experience from the battle.
    Pikachu gains 18 experience from the battle.
    McGill gains 10 experience from the battle.
    Pete gains 9 experience from the battle.

    Pete gains 20 fullness from foot soldier juices.
    Melkor's Ghost acquires a broken heart with 9 milliliters of sadness.

    Day 4
    Time: 9:57 pm

    As the dust settles from the battle, the group hears a loud slow creak coming from the tree ahead. A figure can be seen emerging and hustling towards them. As the figure approaches, the group sees that he is a short fellow, perhaps two and a half feet in height, with a floppy hat upon his head, falling over his pointy ears. He's wearing some fur-lined boots that seem much too large for his scrawny legs and approaches nervously and hastily.

    "I am Bernie, the leader of the Cobbler Elves. You have done us a service by dispatching those foot soldiers, but there is still danger. Quickly, we must hasten into the Uggly Tree where we will remain safe until morning."

    With that, he leads the group to the entrance of the tree, where a grand double door (grand for him, anyway) opens as he draws near. Ward and McGill must duck to get inside but everyone fits in comfortably, as the center of the tree is hollowed out into a wide atrium, about the size of a small living room, upon passing over the threshold. The doors close behind the group and four elves rush behind to place a heavy beam across the doors.

    Everyone settles down and Bernie continues to provide information.

    "This is our home, the Uggly Tree. It is where we make our renowned Uggly Boots." He holds his foot up, admiring his footwear. "Three days ago, we came under siege by foot soldiers from the south of these woods. I am sure that they are the minions of Dr. Swol, a mad enchanter who works in the dark art of magical foot comfort elixirs. No doubt, he heard about the amazing natural and holy foot comfort powers provided by our boots and sent his soldiers in a fit of jealousy to shut us down."

    "Fifteen men came originally. The five you killed this evening were there to keep guard at the base of the tree, but ten more have climbed up into the heights of our tree, where they no doubt have some scheme to destroy our home and livelihood. In the morning, you must climb up after those athletic foot soldiers and destroy them as you destroyed those on the ground."
  13. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    Ward consults his 8-ball...

    What is the current state of the market for magical foot comfort elixirs?

    Quit playing with that thing. We have logistics to consider. How do we want to approach a battle in the canopy of the biggest tree in the world? Gnus are not renowned for their arboreal combat proficiency.
  14. turgy22 Nothing Special

    Ward turns the 8-ball over. "Cost likely."
  15. Spiderman CPA Man in Tights, Dopey Administrative Assistant

    "Pika!" Pikachu finally chirps up. Everyone eagerly crowds around the Pikanese-to-English translator to see what insights Pikachu has to offer... and the readout reads "Pika!" Either the translator is broken or Pikachu isn't saying anything momentus yet...
  16. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    Ward synecoches his gnu to a bovid and then synecdoches his bovid into a mountain goat.

    There, now you are an expert climber.

    I'm gnot a gnu!
  17. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    Pete does not seem too concerned with the prospects of a treetop battle. In fact, he appears to be ready to spin into action.
  18. rokapoke Man Among Gods

    "Do you elves have food to spare for us? We're rather tired and hungry -- starting in the morning fixes the tiredness, but a good feast will help to fuel our efforts on the morrow."
  19. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    "good idea, extend us an olive branch, and our relationship will blossom into something more fruitful"
  20. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    You just drank a nutrient broth, courtesy of our last opponents. Haven't you had enough? Does your thirst for the juices of others know no bounds?

    Ignore her, Pete. She was once a polecat. They break their victims' necks and drag them into their lairs alive so that the meat stays fresh.

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