I'm going to Hell for this...

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Ferret

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The other day I heard a radio ad asking for people to give "The Eternal Gift: The Gift of Christ"

This brought up a few questions:

How do you care for your Christ?

Do you give Him a roommie cage w/ a water bottle and litter box?

Will it get annoying having to clean His water bottle because He
keeps turning His water into wine?

Will your friends grow tired of always having loaves and fishes at your dinner parties?

Every time you take Him to the vet and he looks sick will His doctor say "Oh he'll be fine. Just give him three days"?

Would He get upset every time you serve lamb?

-Ferret

"...oh come on. You have to have a sense of humour this time of year...":)
 
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Shiro, Time Devourer

Guest
You have gone too far off the deep end. WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY too far. I'll wager you'd say the same thing if I joked in this way about some aspect of Wicca.
 
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Bob

Guest
Shiro, if you're going to whine every time Ferret insults christians, just ignore him. He does that constantly, lol. :)
 
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Shiro, Time Devourer

Guest
Ferret: Where did you hear that ad. Sounds interesting.
 
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Nightstalkers

Guest
as long as he leaves the wicca alone we are ok with the truce
 
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Shiro, Time Devourer

Guest
I ain't gonna mack on Wicca. Using insulting satire against a creed isn't my thang.
 
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train

Guest
We make sure to bring him in when it gets cold...

No he prefers close proximity to everything, he's always free to roam as he chooses...

No... we just let it ferment so it becomes vintage and therefore more meaningful to partake in...

No... they usually bring butter and tartar sauce... with the fruit provided they all partake....

No... the doctor usually thinks he can fix his ailment... somehow though we get charged for nothing... he's always better after prognosis and before treatment... the doctor is always awed...

No... In fact it's his idea... The wine and bread also...

(now for those of you paying attention... all answers are cute-shallow and serious-deep...)
;)
 

Ferret

Moderator
Staff member
Thanks for the humourous responses! I especially liked Train's (as always).

I have no problem taking crap for my religion - after all, we've have been doing it longer than any other religions (even the Jews!). Most of the time, when people want to mock another's religion it's because they either do not understand it or want to make sure they're not taking themselves too seriously...heavens know that I don't :)

-Ferret

"Jesus Peanut Butter Cups...Chocolate, Peanut Butter, and small pieces of the Son of God in every bite!"
 
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Shiro, Time Devourer

Guest
Train, you rock. Ferret, your last comment about understanding is, for the most part, correct.

F to tha Izzle indeed.

:D
 
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theorgg

Guest
Seriously, the "gift of Christ" is not somthing you can truly give to somone.

Somone must want to have it, then take it for themself-- that's what causes so much strife in this world nowdays is one religeon trying to "force" what it considers a "gift" onto another different(or in some cases, not that different) religeon.

If I see somthing like the initial post, it makes me laugh, and I think God's laughing it up right along with me. He made the Platypus, for His sake! He HAS a sense of humor(or, possibly, humour).

As for the "Peanut Butter Cup" thing, it offended me a bit-- but I recognised it for what it was: a simple insult to those of some sect of christianity that believe that crackers are a part of Jesus's body. I might not like the joke, but I never really thought about that enough to believe in or disbelieve in it...


*theorgg looks down at the plate of Ritz crackers and Peanut Butter, thinks shallow and niaevly, and looses his appitite.
 

Ferret

Moderator
Staff member
Actually, the Jesus line was from an online comic strip called Goats that I frequent for the occasional dose of twisted humour...

To see the offending strip please click Here.

Oddlye enough the strip did not offend Christians (or Jews) - it offended the Hershey corporation and almost led to a lawsuit.

-Ferret

"...if I offend, I'm sorry that I was taken so seriously..."
 
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train

Guest
Oddlye enough the strip did not offend Christians (or Jews) - it offended the Hershey corporation and almost led to a lawsuit
They just got offended because they're all Hinduism believers...:p

Honestly though they could market somehting to that effect if they made chocolate crackers...;)

:eek: I should be in their marketing dept.:cool: ;) :p
 
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Mazzak

Guest
I have no problem taking crap for my religion - after all, we've have been doing it longer than any other religions (even the Jews!)
Actually, Wicca hasn't been around that long, and the Jews were taking crap from the Pagans way back in the days before Paganism was considered something "evil" (Roman Empire ring a bell?).

Anyway, on topic: That was hilarious.
 
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nodnarb24

Guest
Originally posted by Ferret

Oddlye enough the strip did not offend Christians (or Jews) - it offended the Hershey corporation and almost led to a lawsuit.
I frequent that strip also. I love what they did after Hershey complained...

Hmmm, can't find it on there website, lucky I saved the image...
 

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Ferret

Moderator
Staff member
True, the term "Wicca" has only been around for a few years, but I do not practice 'wicca'. I am a Witch. I have beliefs and practices that date back to the beginnings of civilization. I'm not just another guy w/ long black hair and an all-black wardrobe. I've only watched 'Charmed' once and found 'The Craft' to be an absolute insult to Witches everywhere...

For the most part Witches (as well as other 'Pagan' faiths) kept to themselves. It wasn't until othe religions (mostly guided by greedy leaders w/ over-inflated egos) thought that any religion that was not their own was wrong and needed to be stamped out. Some of the most popular examples included The Roman Empire (pre & post reformation), the crusades, the inquisitions, the New England Witch Trials, and a recent incident at a Krispy Kremes in Clearwater, Fl...

-Ferret

"...we're not out to change the world. We don't care about your souls. We just want to be acknowledged for our right to believe as we choose..."
 
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train

Guest
Some of the most popular examples included The Roman Empire (pre & post reformation), the crusades, the inquisitions, the New England Witch Trials, and a recent incident at a Krispy Kremes in Clearwater, Fl...
There was a second coming at a Krispy Kreme???...

So if we eat Krispy Kreme Donuts we'll be saved?!!...

:eek: :p
 
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