Crapstorm: A New Game: Because... Why Not?

R

rokapoke

Guest
McGill suddenly slaps his forehead. Loudly.

"Ouch!"

He composes himself.

"Maybe we've been making this way too hard... using the 'N' in 'BANJO,' combined with the 'O' and 'E' that are attacking us and the 'D' we've already captured, we can just be 'DONE' with this task. Right?"
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
"Maybe we've been making this way too hard... using the 'N' in 'BANJO,' combined with the 'O' and 'E' that are attacking us and the 'D' we've already captured, we can just be 'DONE' with this task. Right?"
Wrong! Nice try, though.

Day: 2
Time: 10:07am

You are fighting a herd of letter tiles.

Round 7

Melkor's Ghost passes the Y to a king's man, who tries to hide from danger.

The F tile attacks Ward, but gets warded off.
The E tile attacks Melkor's Ghost and faints.
The O tile attacks Pikachu, but fails to make a connection.
The R tile attacks McGill and takes a spill.
The blank tile attacks Pete, but gets a really bad roll.
The D tile attacks a king's man, but the blow glances off his leg.
The A tile attacks a king's man, leaving a nasty bruise on his thigh. Ouch!

Ward catches the F tile in his net.
Melkor's Ghost catches the E tile in his net.
Pikachu catches the O tile in his net.
McGill (barely) catches the R tile in his net.
Pete catches the blank tile in his net.

A king's man releases the Y tile. It thumps him on the head and turns to fight again. Ouch!

The blank tile morphs into an S and nestles itself between the BIDET and BANJO, perfectly happy AS IS. The remaining captured letter tiles then jump out of their nets and create a mob of spiffy FEDORAS, which proceed to chase away the remaining letter tiles. The battle is won!

Just then, the male carrier pigeon comes over to where the captured letter tiles now sit calmly on the ground and tries to pick them up. One of the king's men rushes over and captures it in his net.

"Thanks for your help, travelers! We couldn't have fought off that herd of tiles without your help. Now we'll go and return this animal to the zoo and give word to the king of your achievement. If you aren't too tired, I suggest that you travel north to find the remaining animals that escaped. Oh, also, I found some potentially useful items among the letter tiles."

Ward acquires a zoa pie.
Ward acquires a banjo.
McGill acquires two bidets.
Pete acquires a pair of voting fedoras.

Status update
Everyone loses 1 energy from the efforts of capturing the tiles.
Ward gains 10 experience from catching letters and making words.
Melkor's Ghost gains 5 experience from catching letters.
Pikachu gains 5 experience from catching letters.
McGill gains 8 experience from catching letters and making words.
Pete gains 8 experience from catching letters and making words.
Ward's leadership roll is a 4. Everyone gains 1 experience. Hooray!

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Scored Wold).
 

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
The rogue graphemes have been suppressed. On my return to the office, I must report the unusual preponderance of dissaranged text.

No hurry. These things happen. We came here to settle the matter of escaped wildlife. Remember?

I have not forgotten. Thank you, everyone, for your lexical services. Now that the carrier pigeon is captured, I suggest we ascertain that the other zoo animals are not in this wold before searching elsewhere for the monkey and the zebra...
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
The party searches the remainder of the Wold, but can find nothing except a few stray letter tiles grazing about. As they pass the site of the previous battle, they notice that the formerly tame and organized letter tiles are now gone. It seems the tiles grew restless and may have rejoined the stray letters to form a large herd again. It's probably best to search elsewhere at this point.

Day 2
Time: 12:37 pm

Status Update
Everyone loses 13 fullness and 8 energy while searching for the lost animals.
McGill's udders feel slightly better.

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Scored Wold).
 
R

rokapoke

Guest
McGill attempts to use a bidet to help clean his udders, hoping to sooth his aches.
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
The bidet shoots forth a cool stream of water on McGill's udders. Some pain goes away and McGill feels a lot fresher down there.
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
The party travels north until they come to the edge of the wold. A wide open expanse of land lies before them to the north - a quaintly maintained field, consisting of large squares of grass alternating between a darker and lighter shade of green. The group can barely make out the shapes of figures in the distance. It appears that 16 creatures are lined up in rows across the field: 8 shortish things with extraordinarily round heads stand in the front. Two battlement-shaped figures stand in the far corners, with two gigantic horse heads inside of them and tall pointy-headed things inside of them. In the center of the field are two taller figures wearing crowns, one of which is topped with a cross. Each of the creatures stands on its own shaded square of grass and they all seem to be staring intently ahead, though all remain very still.

As the group moves to explore further, they find themselves unable to step onto the field. Suddenly, one of the king's men (not one from before - this is a new guy) rushes up from behind and motions for everyone to step back. He is visibly wounded and seems exhausted from battle, as he speaks laboriously to bestow advice to the group.

"Beware, travelers. Ahead on that field sits an army of chessmen. I was scouting this region earlier by the king's command and finally spotted his missing zebra when I was blocked by that group and pulled into battle against them. Chessmen know nothing other than to capture other chessmen and when they found I could not be captured, they tried to kill me. I am lucky to have escaped in tact."

"Now it seems the task of defeating this army falls to you, if we are to recover the king's zebra. The king has granted you all the power he has when traveling through the chessfield. In other words, you may move and attack from one square of grass to another adjacent square of grass in any direction. Attempt to capture the pieces with your nets. If successful, you will be bestowed with that piece's power until the battle is over. I recommend attempting to capture the king (the chessman king, not the King of Queens), as his army will surrender if he becomes trapped. Also, you don't all have to stay together. Though you will enter the field on the king's square, you can then split up in any way you see fit to win the battle. Good luck!"

The party steps forward and enters the chessfield on the king's square.

Day 2
Time: 2:00 pm

You are fighting an army of chessmen.

Graphical representation of your location:

---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| R | N | B | Q | K | B | N | R |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| P | P | P | P | P | P | P | P |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | U | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Status update
Everyone loses 7 fullness and 4 energy while traveling.

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Chessfield).

Additional notes:
There was some travel time to get to the chessfield. If you decide to eat or rest before the battle, that's fine with me.
Right now, anyone can post a move of one square in any direction for any member of the party. Either use keypad directions (Up, right, down-and-left, etc) or map directions (north, east, south-west, etc) to state the move. If you acquire additional powers, you'll also need to state how many squares you'd like to move. If you move into a square with a chessman, you'll automatically attempt to capture it.

The "U" is your current location. If you split up, I'll use the first initial of the character's creator to designate that character's location (O = Ward, M = Melkor's Ghost, S = Pikachu, R = McGill, D = Pete). Two characters can move and attack together, as long as they have the same chess powers. Only the character who makes the catch will receive the captured piece's power, though.
You never lose powers. So if you capture a pawn, you can still move and attack like a king.

For every move you make, the chessmen will respond with a move of their own, so try not to post two moves in a row (especially if someone else has already posted a move.)
If there are any additional questions, feel free to ask. I don't think it's going to be as complicated as it might seem right now and you certainly don't need to be good at chess to succeed. Just move around and attack the chessmen when they get close enough. Acquire their powers and capture their king.
 

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
We can distribute or entire party into some kind of trap most efficiently by making or initial moves with the entire party minus one of us. In other words, the entire party moves left (or west) except for Melkor's ghost. Then on our next turn, we all move up (or north) except for Pete. And so on. That should give us an advantage, but I haven't touched a chess board in years and Ward has never played. So I'm not even sure what our trap should look like...
 
D

DarthFerret

Guest
Pete looks at the board, sees eight different directions that can constitute a move, counts his legs and wonders what would happen if each leg wanted a different square. In order to find out, he moves up one square.
 
R

rokapoke

Guest
Do the chessmen move after a single person moves, or after all group members have moved?
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
Do the chessmen move after a single person moves, or after all group members have moved?
Good question. If a single character makes a single move (in this case, one space), one chessman will move in reply. If multiple characters starting in one space move together to another space, that only counts as one move and only one chessman will move in reply.
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
Moving on... Pete moves forward one square.

The pawn standing directly in front of the king moves forward two squares.

Day 2
Time: 2:01 pm

You are fighting an army of chessmen.

Graphical representation of your location:

---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| R | N | B | Q | K | B | N | R |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| P | P | P | P | - | P | P | P |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | P | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | D | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | U | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Status update
Pete loses one energy while moving forward.

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Chessfield).

Another additional note:
Everyone has safety numbers for this battle, but since this battle doesn't work like a traditional round-by-round battle, the numbers will get re-rolled for all non-moving characters each round and decremented as usual for all moving/attacking characters. I'll post the numbers when I have my spreadsheet handy, but it shouldn't matter much in how you move, anyway.
 
R

rokapoke

Guest
So if I 'capture' a chess piece, I gain its powers... but what happens if a chess piece captures me?

McGill moves northeast, following Sophia's idea of fanning out.
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
So if I 'capture' a chess piece, I gain its powers... but what happens if a chess piece captures me?
Chessmen can't capture you. If they make a move that lands them in the same square as a party member, a fight will ensue until the square is claimed (probably they'll end up captured) or someone retreats to a different square.
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
McGill moves northeast.

The bishop standing next to the king moves diagonally four spaces.

Day 2
Time: 2:02 pm

You are fighting an army of chessmen.

Graphical representation of the situation:

---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| R | N | B | Q | K | - | N | R |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| P | P | P | P | - | P | P | P |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | P | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | B | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | D | R | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | U | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Status update
McGill loses one energy while moving forward.
Ward's leadership roll is a 2. Everyone gets a cookie. Hooray!

Safety Numbers
Ward: 6
Melkor's Ghost: 4
Pikachu: 8
McGill: 6
Pete: 4

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Chessfield).
 
R

rokapoke

Guest
"Maybe Ward and Melkor's ghost should move with Pikachu -- no need to get into a battle this early. Just my two cents."
 

turgy22

Nothing Special
Pikachu moves west.

The knight on the queen's side jumps over the pawn in front of him and moves toward the center of the field.

Day 2
Time: 2:03 pm

You are fighting an army of chessmen.

Graphical representation of the situation:

---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| R | - | B | Q | K | - | N | R |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| P | P | P | P | - | P | P | P |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | N | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | P | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | B | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | - | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | - | D | R | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---
| - | - | - | S | U | - | - | - |
---- --- --- --- --- --- --- ---

Key:
K = king
Q = queen
B = bishop
N = knight
R = rook
P = pawn
D = Pete
R = McGill
S = Pikachu
U = Ward & Melkor's Ghost

Status update
Pikachu loses one energy while moving.

Chess Powers
Ward: king
Melkor's Ghost: king
Pikachu: king
McGill: king
Pete: king

Safety Numbers
Ward: 6
Melkor's Ghost: 4
Pikachu: 7
McGill: 6
Pete: 4

The party is currently in the Game Preserve (the Chessfield).
 
Top