2006 CPA Notable Awards!

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Spiderman, Sep 26, 2006.

  1. Spiderman CPA Man in Tights, Dopey Administrative Assistant

    A few weeks ago, Spiderman *thwips* through the sky and lands on the movie theater. Or what he thinks is a movie theater. Climbing inside, he's a bit disconcerted to find out that it's now a karoke bar!

    "Well, this is a bit unexpected. Should I get a new place? But everyone thinks it's here! Hmmm..."

    Thinking fast, Spiderman realizes that perhaps it will work out, that there's built-in entertainment between awards AND no one has to bring the alcohol (for those of legal drinking age, of course ;) ). He finds the owner and arranges to buy out the bar at award time AND to provide an open bar.

    Present day...

    Spiderman manages to get his buddies the Avengers and Fantastic Four to cover for him and *thwips* back to the bar, ready to present the awards. He sets up the podium, adjusts the speakers and sound system, and downs a White Russian. He figures he might as well test the karoke system and starts with "Video Killed the Radio Star" by the Buggles when...

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  2. Killer Joe Active Member

    ...when he realizes that no one can hear him through his mask! :p
  3. Spiderman CPA Man in Tights, Dopey Administrative Assistant

    A weird occurance, since most villains seem to hear his insults just fine through the mask. However, just to make sure, Spidey lifts up his mask so his mouth shows and belts out a passable rendition.

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  4. Killer Joe Active Member

    As Killer Joe sits down in the fifth row third seat in from the left, he realizes that he's the only able to see a pair of ugly but talented lips protruding for the web-slinger. :)
  5. Ransac CPA Trash Man

    *Ransac arrives, and he actually showered this time!!!! He pays the door attendant for entrance and flings his arms wide open to signal his triumphant arrival!!!!!!!!!.......*

    *.... of course no one notices him. Everyone is watching that horrible spider butcher 80's songs. Dejected, Ransac asks the attendant to show him to the bar. The attendant replies that it's another fee to drink. Ransac pays. Ransac then orders water. After getting wasted on H20, he concocts a plan to upstage Spidey. He asks the attendant to show him the restroom......... another fee is paid. Ransac flushes himself down the toilet and miraculously (don't ask how) ends up falling from the ceiling of the stage......... right next to Spidey...... and no one notices except for Spidey after his set, who asks Ransac about why he did what he did.*

    I guess I wanted to steal the show.

    *Spidey demonstrates how this is not possible by juggling three chair with one hand. Ransac then cusses over how he wasted the money in fees. Spidey then explains that there are no fees and there is not an attendant.*



    ............that oink. Guess I'll just get in my Penguin Suit and prepare the winner's random questions again.

    *Ransac continues his plotting.*

    Ransac, cpa trash man
  6. Mooseman Isengar Tussle

    As mooseman enters the establishment, gravity for him seems to be suddenly negated. He pushes off from the nearest chair and soars to the ceiling. He caroms off of the smoke filled ceiling at a sharp angle, aiming for KJ's drink. "Ugh, a Shirley Temple?" and spins in a circle, the hurled liquid forming droplets that slowly spread out into the bar, refracting the stage light into a slow moving Hollywood special effect type of disco lights.

    The refracted lights cause Spiderman to appear to be covered in fruity colored spots and attracts everyone attention. Mooseman glides with unchecked momentum into the path of a buxom bar wench, trusting that his trajectory and speed are timed perfectly. Suddenly, gravity is restored to normality........
  7. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    at which time, DarthFerret enters, standing tall in his shiny black boots, dark volumous cape and with all of his medals of honor from the Imperial Senate adorning his vest. All his acountroments are visible, including a new triple bladed light sabre (of his own design of course), a set of Imperial Issue manacles, and his jar of pickle juice (don't ask!). He takes a seat towards the rear of the building and ponders about why they call them buildings when they have already done been built...

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  8. orgg Administrator

    *theorgg wanders out of the backroom with some additional audio equipment, then sunters through a large opening that appears to lead nowhere, but actually ends up where the projector was once in the theater, and where all audio is taken care of now.

    You didn't know they redid this place, Spidy? I could've sworn I e-mailed you about my new job...

    *checks his 'joke of the day' e-mail, and laughs as he says "Because if they called 'em "Builts," dyslexics would try walking on them!" That's clever!

    *(checks the digital signup sheet)

    Next Up, we have Ransac singing Jyhad Jerry and the Evildoers's "I Need A Chick!"
  9. mythosx Legendary Creature-Human

    *i just show up*
  10. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    In his original entrance, Oversoul tried to crash the party. Last year, he opted for a more extreme measure and tried to blow the party up--with bombs. And since that was obviously not enough, this year will need to top last year completely. But what could top trying to blow the party up? In Oversoul's mind, you just can't beat massive explosions. Maybe if he tries very hard, he can overcome this and devise an entrance more awesome than blowing everything up...

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  11. Nightstalkers Creature — Nightstalker

    The Nightstalkers burst through the doors and swarms the concession stand. Soon all of the foodstuffs and soda machines are empty, not to mention a skeletal usher completely picked clean of valuables and anything edible. The Nightstalkers begin mulling around the theatre until they catch wind of TomB. A more prestigious Nightstalker cries out for order in the throng, having to toss a thong in to sweeten the deal, and proceeds to make plans. After a brief, but entertaining game of "dismember the security guard", a plan is hatched and the prestigious Nightstalker stands up before the rabble and bellows "PUT ON YOUR CLOAKS!" To this the mob of Nighstalkers dashes to the cloak room to dawn their cloaks and are never seen again by the patrons of the theatre.
  12. Melkor Well-Known Member

    For then Fingolfin, beholding (as it seemed to him) the utter ruin of the CPA Notables was filled with wrath and despair as he mounted up Rochallor his great horse and rode forth alone, and none might restrain him. Thus he came alone to Angband's gates, and he sounded his horn, and smote once more upon the brazen doors, and challenged Melkor to come forth to the CPA Notables. And Melkor came.

    That was the last time in this year that he passed the doors of his stronghold, and it is said that he took not the challenge willingly; for though his might was greatest of all things in this world, alone of the Valar he knew fear. But he could not now deny the challenge of the CPA Notables before the face of his captains; for the rocks rang with the shrill music of Fingolfin's horn, and his voice came keen and clear down into the depths of Angband; and Fingolfin named Melkor craven, and lord of slaves. Therefore Melkor came, climbing slowly from his subterranean throne, and the rumour of his feet was like thunder underground. And he issued forth clad in black armour; and he stood before the Karaoke Bar like a tower, iron-crowned, and his vast shield, sable unblazoned, cast a shadow over the Awards Show like a stormcloud.
  13. Ransac CPA Trash Man

    *Ransac pantses Melkor (or de-leg-armors him) in front of the rest of the crowd.*


    Ransac, cpa trash man
  14. Limited Yes, but we won't care

    *Limited enters the establishment, dressed in a purple tuxedo, holding a frying pan in his left hand and a bananapeel in the other*

    "What's that guy without pants doing here?" he remarks.
  15. Spiderman CPA Man in Tights, Dopey Administrative Assistant

    Spiderman fumbles with his notes.

    "Sorry guys, there's a 'technical problem' in the voting software. Hopefully it'll resolve as soon as possible. In the meantime, continue to entertain yourselves with the karoke!"

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  16. Ransac CPA Trash Man

    *Ransac laughs his oink off as Oversoul goes up to sing and the Karaoke DJ accidentally cues up "I feel like a Woman"*

    Ransac, cpa trash man
  17. Mooseman Isengar Tussle

    The Evil black booted, cape wearing Zondarg, Honored of the Imperial Senate, has used the earth's own gravity to try and caputure our intrepid hero, mooseman, savior of the galaxy. Using lightning speed, MM bolts for the airlock, attempting a daring escape. But......
  18. Melkor Well-Known Member

    *Melkor quickly puts his leg armour back on, and pointedly stares straight ahead, stalks toward an usher, when the usher informs him that no booth is reserved for him, Melkor motions for a balrog to enter and drag off the usher with his fiery whip. Melkor then sits in the booth nearest the stage and yells "Freebird" while Oversoul tries to get through his song.
  19. DarthFerret Evil Sith Weasel

    DarthFerret uses the force to prevent the sound of Oversoul's singin from reaching the ears of the crowd, thus becoming the most popular person there, as an encore, he then throws monkeys at the chandelier, and watches the feathers fly!

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  20. Oversoul The Tentacled One

    Hey, crazy people, Oversoul is not yet in the building. Stop hallucinating.

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