The united states should be conquered by canada and mexico

[MrXarvox]

Sorry, but this country causes far too much trouble. It's time we were subverted by the UN and forced to turn over the land to Canada and Mexico. And Canada and Mexico should unite as well, forming the nation of North America under a constitution written by agnostics. Yeah! That is what should happen.
Support? Criticism? Demands to know why I posted this at all?
(it is 3 in the morning, and it sounds like a good idea. good enough for ya?)

 

[Svenmonkey]

Oh, come on, now 3 am is late for you?! You've gone for about 76 hours without sleep before and your saying the fact that it's 3 am is making you incoherent?

And why go for a unified North America when you can have a divided, half-poor North America? And why have pants when you can have no pants?

 

[MrXarvox]

dude, with the kind of schedule and workload I have, 3 a.m. is indeed late.

 

[Ferret]

Um, I don't like the idea of any country merging w/ the U.S. We're too arogant. We would try to make everyone else be just like us - oh wait! We already do.

We criticize the Canadians, but no one ever wants to go to war w/ them, they've got universal healthcare that won't bankrupt you should you get something more serious than a cold.

We criticize the Mexicans because they're overcrowded, poor, overly religious, not too bright...wait. I think I just blew my point.

-Ferret

"...never mind..."

 

[train]

Ummmmm... What would Canada and Mexico do without us here militarily???... Be conquered by the Phillipines!!!!

What would they do without us here economically???... Sell beans and Ice to each other!!!!

What would happen if they both ended up sharing control over us???... We'd be eating beans and drinking ice-melt for the rest of our lives, while under Phillipine Sovereignty!!!

 

[Ferret]

Actually, Canada does have a product that the export to the US: Oil. We get more of it from them than any other country...

-Ferret

"...if Mexico and Canada became one they could sell Oil of Ole!"

 

[MrXarvox]

"...if Mexico and Canada became one they could sell Oil of Ole!"

just another of the many perks of merging the countries.

 

[sageridder]

Canada also has recently discovered a huge wealth of diamonds.They say when fully developed these sites could produce more than the mines in South Africa.

 

[MrXarvox]

That almost makes me want to go live in Canada.
CHEAP DIAMONDS!!
Rubies are prettier though...

 

[Ferret]

Hmmm. this gives me some food for thought.

Most of the countries that we've taken such a big interest in have a major financial influence on the world.

We made a big deal out of South Africa in recent decades. It wasn't about Apartheid (which it should have been!) No, instead we were more concerned about their luxury resources and the impact they have on the international marketplace.

When we liberated Kuwait from their "oppressors" it was because they supplied lots of oil to one of our major financial partners, Japan. America, at the time, was only getting less than 8% of their oil from them.

There's a few other examples that I cannot think of at the moment (haven't had my morning cup of coffee yet), but you can imagine that if we could find a way to get alternates to oil from Middle Eastern countries we could just let Israel and India nuke the lot of them and not have to worry about terrorism any more. If we found an alternative to the Diamonds and Gold from South Africa we wouldn't care about who's running the country, the colour of their skin, or the general political attitudes they have.

-Ferret

"...and if this country could make some decent cigars, we wouldn't care too much about Cuba..."

 

[train]

Great point Ferret, we'd just have to worry about the conflicts our other supliers get involved in...

And there's just no substitute for refried beans, we need technology like that from Mexico!!!

 

[Svenmonkey]

"...if we could find a way to get alternates to oil from Middle Eastern countries we could just let Israel and India nuke the lot of them and not have to worry about terrorism any more."

This is the standard American point of view right now, and I can't stand the standard American point of view.

Americans are so oblivious to the rest of the world, we think that our country can do whatever it wants. I hope that the UN attacks us if and when we attack Iraq, for the politicians in office clearly just want to put in a puppet democracy and get oil for cheap. I hate how our country is run by corporate bigwigs and rich folk, and there isn't even a single party that isn't run by a bunch of rich bastards. I'm going to vote green for the rest of my life, and possibly physically assault the leaders of the democrats and republicans.

 

[Thallid Ice Cream Man]

Originally posted by Svenmonkey
I'm going to vote green for the rest of my life, and possibly physically assault the leaders of the democrats and republicans.

Only if you can do some serious physical damage to them. Then I guess I'd likely approve.

But with Disney's skill in animatronics these days...

Genghis Khan should take over the world.

 

[Ferret]

I guess, this is the problem. All of the huge ammounts of money that are used to sponsor the parties will guarantee that we can keep up w/ our "Ameri-centric" attitude. I guess the problem is that between Peal Harbor and 9/11/01 we've never known what it's like to be in mortal danger from a foreign power...

-Ferret

"...that is, if the attacks on 9/11 WERE from foreign powers..."

 

[Ura]

Ummmmm... What would Canada and Mexico do without us here militarily???... Be conquered by the Phillipines!!!!

Mmmm, conquered by the land of banana ketchup. Cute girls too. Might not be so bad. Except for that Canada has never lost a war it was involved in and has almost never lost a major confrontation. We've repelled every attempt at invasion including two by the U.S. a long time ago.
*insert overzealous flag waving here*
Bring on the cute Phillipino girls.

Actually, Canada does have a product that the export to the US: Oil. We get more of it from them than any other country...

And natural gas, bulk electricity, fresh water, base metals and fossil fules, not to mention all the other items we trade back and forth everyday. If Canada were to shut off the power and water on our side of the border almost the entire west coast would go dark in the U.S. and we'd have alot of blown transformers. Being in California would really suck for a little while and lots of people would be a little thirsty.

If we found an alternative to the Diamonds and Gold from South Africa we wouldn't care about who's running the country, the colour of their skin, or the general political attitudes they have.

Since the U.S. has the worlds largest gold reserves by a long shot the U.S. federal reserve has more influence on the precious metals market then any other single group. Diamonds from Africa are tricky because they are almost the only really good supplier since the Canadian forcasts are still very much theoretical in some areas.

And there's just no substitute for refried beans, we need technology like that from Mexico!!!

Hell yeah!

There's a few other examples that I cannot think of at the moment (haven't had my morning cup of coffee yet), but you can imagine that if we could find a way to get alternates to oil from Middle Eastern countries we could just let Israel and India nuke the lot of them and not have to worry about terrorism any more.

Ironically the uranium that the U.S. uses to make its nukes is mined, refined, and supplied by Canada. (or at least about 90% of it is)


Merge with the land of igloo's, dog sleds, hockey fans, and beer drinkers. At least thats what we like you to think is here.

 

[train]

Ura, ur right...

Canada hasn't lost a war it's been involved in... but man, with Mexico being the one you're involved with, that could smell trouble...

Refried beans are the rationing food for Mexico's soldiers, and though refried beans are wonderful, the gases exhumed could cripple forces of the Can-exican military opening a floodgate for Banana Warriors to surf in on...

Just make sure the Can-exican military is equipped with individual gas warfare masks before sending them into battle...

 

[Ura]

Erk! You may be right.
Time to launch our underpaid scientists into a quest to make the gasless refried bean. Then we'll rule the world. Mwahahahaha!

 

[Ferret]

Nice. Those were some really good points about Canada...Perhaps, too good - next thing you know, we might be looking nortward for our fifty-first through fifty-sixth states...

-Ferret

"...and it would give us a chance to finally get rid of Anne Murray!!!"

 

[Ura]

Hehe, they practically already are the 51st through 56th states. Though you may want to ditch Quebec.
American and Canadian interests are so intertwined at times that its only the color of our money that makes us different.
Canadians tend to be fiercely independent and proud to be Canadian though, so assimilating into the U.S. probably won't happen for a long long time.

 

[Spiderman]

but you can imagine that if we could find a way to get alternates to oil from Middle Eastern countries

There's Alaska and the former Russian areas... plus the US gets a lot from South America.

"...that is, if the attacks on 9/11 WERE from foreign powers..."

Please tell me you're not buying into a bunch of hogwash conspiracy theories...