CPA Set II...

D

DÛke

Guest
...

Seeing how Ransac is rivaling my abilities, I worried as hell ;). He just might be a better card maker than I...so I will contribute another CPA set, seeing how there are new members and threads to drain information from. :)

Free Will or Destiny (1W)
Instant
Flip a coin.
If the flip ends in your favor, gain 10 life, otherwise, all other player's gain 5 life.
"Do humans have free will to do as they please, or is the course of events preordained?" - Landkiller, asking the question that will never be answered, YET!

Exterminate the Bug (4B)
Instant
Destroy target creature. It can't regenerate.
If that creature is Green, its controller loses 5 life.
If that creature is a Spider of ANY kind or heck, even an insect of any freakin' sort...you win the game.
"Take THIS Spiderman!" - DÛke, hoping this card will be released in Foil format.

CPA Set Via Ransac (BUWGR)
Sorcery
[Sorry, not this time]
"You will NOT defeat MY abilities Ransac." - An unknown CPA member.

TheOrgg's "BOOM" (1W)
Enchantment
W: Target permanent becomes White until end of the turn.
"Persist in this line of thought, and every post you has goes "BOOOM. [By makin' it complete shiney white]" -TheOrgg, to DÛke and to ANYONE that dares try to exterminate any orggs...

Almindhra's Preverted Thoughts (3UB)
Instant
Search your library for a card and put it into your hand. Shuffle your library, and draw a card.
"Why don't you go listen to some Madonna and wack off?" -Almindhra, to DÛke. Communicated throughout Darsh, on AIM.

Zadok, the "Greek Ra" (4WW)(3/3)
Creature - "Greek (Geek?) Ra" Legend
First Strike, Protection from White.
GG, sacrifice a creature: Draw cards equal to the sacrificed creature's total mana cost and discard 3 cards.
"...if [the Greek Ra] is Zadok, than child...you gotsa be wackooooooooo..." - DÛke, hopin' that Zadok doesn't see this card.

Rando's Name Game (1GW)
Sorcery
Name a card and reveal the top card of your library.
If it's the named card, put into your hand and name another card and reveal the top card of your library again...do this over and over and over and over and over until you don't reveal the named card. When you reveal the unnamed card, remove it from the game and draw 2 cards.
"Here, for your time wasting pleasure, is a... - The keys word is "wasting". Rando says the word "waste" quite often.[/i]

Next time:
Arhar, Chaos Turtle's B***h
Why Do We Like Killing People?
Rando, the Criminal
Multani, the Member that think he knows ALL
Rand, the Dork Lord

...and probably more...
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
I'm pleased to see you making more cards of the CPA. I would like to see what my card does, though. Oh, well. Maybe next time.



Ransac, cpa trash man
 
F

fuzzy510

Guest
Oh wait, this isn't TMS Set II (Or III, I've lost count), is it? If it is: I'll help out this time. Promise. If it isn't: Could you include me, because I believe that I was NEVER INCLUDED IN THE LAST SET DESPITE MY INSISTENT WHINING!!!! LET ME IN THE SET!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
C

Cateran Emperor

Guest
Ah, so Duke is up to his old tricks once more. This shall be entertaining.
 
D

DÛke

Guest
...

Ademis, the Cursed Poet (WU)
Creature - Poet Legend
Ademis can't be the target of spells or abilities.
Whenever you play a spell, you may play another spell without paying its mana cost if that spell's name rhymes with the other spell.
When a player is targeted by a spell you control, that player can't play spells until his or her next turn.
0/1
"...nobody posts after you because you're a poet." - maraud234

DÛke, the Songwriter (No Poet Here)(1UB)
Creature - Songwriter Legend
As DÛke comes into play, if you are listening to:
Madonna, draw a card;
Moby, untap all lands you control;
Enigma, target player discards a card;
Delerium, tap all artifacts, creatures, and lands target player controls;
Sting, target player loses 2 life;
Gorillaz, put 2 +1/+1 counter on DÛke.
2/2
"I can't live without music...music makes me stronger..." - DÛke.

Rando, the Smooth Criminal (2UB)
Creature - Smooth Criminal Legend
B, Tap: Search your library for an Instant or Sorcery card that contains all the following words in its text box (flavor text not included): "destroy", "target", "creature". Put that card into your hand and shuffle your library.
U, Tap: Search your library for an Instant or Sorcery card that contains all the following words in its text box (again, flavor text aint included): "counter", "target", "spell". That card MAY also contain the word "unless". Put that card into your hand and shuffle your library.
2/1
"You've been hit by [boom, boom] You've been struck by [BOOM, BOOM] A smooth criminal!" - Michael Jackson's "Smooth Criminal".

Arhar, Chaos Turtle's B***h (2UG)
Creature - Bytch Legend
UG: Target creature gains +1/+1 and is unblockable until end of the turn.
If that creature is Chaos Turtle, that creature gains +3/+3 instead.
3/3
"YES, I know it's the other way dang it! Chaos Turtle is supposed to be Arhar's bitch...not vise versa! (I don't care)" - DUke, thinking he's gonna get complaints for not knowing who, exactly, is THE bytch.

Chaos Turtle, the One that THINKS He's Sexy (4UG)
Creature - Just Wanna Be Sexy Dang it Legend
UG: Search your library for a card with a highly, highly intellectual name and put it into your hand. Shuffle your library. Should a debate occur about the level of intellectuality of the card, the game is considered a draw unless any player pays 1.
3/3
"You are smart, funny and an excellent player (I'm sure), but you are NOT sexy." - Yellowjacket, to Chaos Turtle, in Rand's ONLY Thread in the Off-Topic.

Multani, the Member that thinks he knows ALL (1GG)
Creature - Magic card that counts as a creature
Multani gains +1/+1 for each card in each player's hand.
As Multani comes into play, name ALL the cards in your deck. That's right, EACH and EVERY one of them. If you can't,
sacrifice Multani. Note: The opponent may check your library to make sure you named EVERY
card.
2/2
"Thwip!" - Oops, wrong member...

Rand, the Lord of Darkness (Dorkness) (2BB)
Creature - Dark (Dork) Legend
This card has no abilities.
0/1
"Look at THIS Spiritmonger..." - DÛke.

Fuzzy, "fuzzy" as in what? (3)
Creature - "Fuzzy" as in what? Legend
U: Fuzzy becomes "fuzzy", as in "hard to see", therefore, he can't be the target of spells or abilities until end of the turn.
G: Fuzzy becomes "fuzzy", as in "the other definition", therefore, he gains +1/+1 until end of the turn.
W: Fuzzy becomes "fuzzy", as in "foolish", therefore,
you shuffle your library.
2/2
"Happy, Fuzzy?" - DÛke, and all the CPA members who beheld Fuzzy's groveling ability.

THE Cowboy Song (G)
Sorcery
Search your library for all cards that contain ANY of the following words
(flavor text not included): "Cow", "Boy", "Song", "Kay", and "Kio".
Put that card into your hand, shuffle your library, and draw a card.
"Kay kio kio cow boy..." - Hawaiian Mage bringin' you his most controversial thread to date.

I'm Cool Because I Add The Extra "U" (1U)
Instant
Choose a your favoUrite coloUr.
Your opponent names his favoUrite coloUr also.
The audience, if any, decides which one of the coloUrs is cooler.
The person with the cooler coloUr draws 2 cards.
If there's no audience, simply have a brawl. The winner wins the game.
"Gizmo"

Britney Spears (WR)
Creature - Slutty Legend
Whenever Britney Spears deal damage, you may pay R to deal 1 damage to target player, AKA "Oops, I Did It Again".
Whenever Britney Spears is dealt damage, any player may pay 2 to deal an additional 1 damage to Britney, AKA "Hit Me Baby One More Time".
1W: Flip a coin, if you win the flip, gain 3 life. You may pay 1 to reflip the coin once, AKA "Lucky".
1R: Britney Spears gains +1/+1 until end of the turn, AKA "Now I'm Stronger".
1/3
"...but DÛke, she's not a CPA member..."
 
F

fuzzy510

Guest
I was finally included! Now I can stop bitching and moaning!!!!!!
 
T

Thallid Ice Cream Man

Guest
Hmm... what an interesting turn of events... If my memory serves me, the last time DÛke did this, it was I who whined and fuzzy who told me to stop whining.

DÛke, the Songwriter(No Poet Here) : Think what would happen if someone were listening to ALL of them... :D
(Of course, their opponent would probably have conceded already for that reason.)

Almindhra's Perverted Thoughts are communicated THROUGHOUT Darsh? That's more than I needed to know! ;) j/k
 
P

Phyrexian Pie-Eater

Guest
yes...i remember when everyone found out that the accent makes it pronounced like that...the good ol' days...anywho: WHERE'S MY CARD DAMMIT!? MAKE ME OR I MAKE YOU MAKE ME

LOVE Always,
PPE
 
T

Turtlewax Joe

Guest
since I was kicked off for a bit, you owe me a card *looks serious, then bursts out in tears*I missed you guys!! thank you for taking me back!

can I have a card or what?

Turtlewax Joe, Cpa Reject
 
D

DÛke

Guest
...I had the idea on my mind:

Prayer For The Ol'days (2U)
Enchantment
Whenever a permanent comes into play, put a New counter on it.
Sacrifice Prayer For The Ol'days: Return all permanents with a New
counters on them back to owner's hand.
"...who here can remember the good ol days..." - Phyrexian Pie-Eater, a very touching subject in the Off-Topic forum.
 
Z

Zadok001

Guest
Tut, tut, DUke. :) It's summer, and I don't have a demanding summer job. I have time to browse all the forums. You are an evil, evil man... :) (J/K)

(Greek Ra was Apollo, btw...)
 
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