I
Istanbul
Guest
Picture it:
A television show...
Where monkeys...
Throw pies...
At Uma Thurman.
Now, I'm not picky. They can be any kinds of pie. Blueberry, cherry, apple, pumpkin pie (for our Thanksgiving day special), even rhubarb. They can even be different kinds of monkeys. Old world, new world, rhesus, chimps, all sorts of monkeys. (Gorillas only for our Christmas special. Otherwise, they don't count.) Uma can have guests on the shows...stars can pitch their movies, so long as they realize that they will have all manner of simians pitching pastries at their faces. If Uma Thurman becomes somehow incapacitated (though it won't be due to a primate-related incident, due to the policy of killing any offending monkey in front of the others to make an example out of him), Pamela Anderson will be recruited by our producers to fill in. Don't accept any substitutes, either! No gazelles lobbing eclairs at Oprah Winfrey! No squirrels hucking sweet buns at Britney Spears! (She already has her own sweet buns...er...anyway.) MONKEYS THROWING PIES AT UMA THURMAN. That's what it's all about. Watching those sweetness-filled treats splattering against the visage and chestal area of one of this country's better-known model-types.
It's pie-tastic!
A television show...
Where monkeys...
Throw pies...
At Uma Thurman.
Now, I'm not picky. They can be any kinds of pie. Blueberry, cherry, apple, pumpkin pie (for our Thanksgiving day special), even rhubarb. They can even be different kinds of monkeys. Old world, new world, rhesus, chimps, all sorts of monkeys. (Gorillas only for our Christmas special. Otherwise, they don't count.) Uma can have guests on the shows...stars can pitch their movies, so long as they realize that they will have all manner of simians pitching pastries at their faces. If Uma Thurman becomes somehow incapacitated (though it won't be due to a primate-related incident, due to the policy of killing any offending monkey in front of the others to make an example out of him), Pamela Anderson will be recruited by our producers to fill in. Don't accept any substitutes, either! No gazelles lobbing eclairs at Oprah Winfrey! No squirrels hucking sweet buns at Britney Spears! (She already has her own sweet buns...er...anyway.) MONKEYS THROWING PIES AT UMA THURMAN. That's what it's all about. Watching those sweetness-filled treats splattering against the visage and chestal area of one of this country's better-known model-types.
It's pie-tastic!
