The 'Redneck' creature type (Un-Set kind of creature)

Discussion in 'Home Made Cards' started by KingAlanI, Dec 8, 2006.

  1. KingAlanI New Member

    EDIT: For those if you who don't know, 'redneck' refers to people living in the southern US, especially the rural southern US or the rural Appalachian Mountains. Can be positive or perjorative, depending on ghow the term is used. These cards poke fun at stereotpyes often associated with rednecks.
    ---------

    "Alarmingly Racist Hick"
    Cost: 3WR
    P/T: 3/2
    Card Type: Creature - Human Redneck
    Rules Text -
    Haste
    {X}, {Tap}- Deal X damage to target black creature.
    Flavor Text-
    "Billy-Ray, where'd ah put mah ropes an' torches?"

    -------------

    "Little Jimmy"
    Cost: 1WR
    P/T: 2/2
    Card Type: Creature - Human Redneck Child
    Rules Text -
    Flavor Text- "Aw shucks, mama. Squirrel again?"

    ------------

    Shoutgun
    Cost: (5)
    Card Type: Artifact - Equipment Shotgun
    Rules Text-
    Equip (2)
    Target creature gets +3/+0.
    If target creature is a Redneck, it gains an additional +1/+1.
    Equipped creature gains "{TAP}- Destroy target Squirrel, Deer or Raccoon".

    -----------

    Budweiser Case
    Cost: 5WW
    Card Type: Enchantment
    Rules Text-
    {THIS} comes into play with twenty-four Can counters on it.
    Remove one Can counter from {THIS} to give target Redneck +0/+1 OR +1/+0 until end of turn.
    May not chose target Redneck as a target for {THIS}'s abilities more than four times per turn.
    Flavor Text-
    "Only $14.49 at the Piggly Wiggly!"

    -----------

    Aunt Polly
    Cost: 3WR
    P/T: 1/4
    Card Type: Creature - Human Redneck
    Rules Text:
    If you control another Redneck, {THIS} comes into play with 9 Time counters on it. If you do not control another Redneck, {THIS} comes into play with one Waiting counter. The next time a Redneck comes into play, remove all Waiting counters from this, and put 9 Time counters on this.
    Remove one Time counter at the start of each upkeep and at the end of each turn.
    Once their are no Waiting or Time counters on {THIS}, put 10 1/1 Redneck Child creature tokens into play.
    Flavor Text:
    "You sure have a lot of 'em, dont you Miss Polly?"
    "Yep. Now y'all younguns get back now, you here."

    Redneck Patriarch
    Cost: 4WR
    P/T: 2/2
    Card Type: Creature - Human Redneck Lord
    Rules text:
    All Rednecks get +1/+1.

    Flavor Text: "There a lot of tradition in dis here Jessup fambly. Mah great-granpappy fought in deh War, and we've worked this here land since before that. We's proud folks. Now don't throw that tradition away by learnin how ter read an' write well, like some uppity Yankee..."

    --------

    Budweiser Six-Pack
    Cost: 1WW
    Card Type: Enchantment
    Rules Text- {THIS} comes into play with six Can counters on it.
    Remove one Can counter from {THIS} to give target Redneck +0/+1 OR +1/+0 until end of turn.
    May not chose target Redneck as a target for {THIS}'s abilities more than three times per turn.
    Flavor Text-
    "Only $3.49 at the Piggly Wiggly!"

    ----------

    "Uncle Jack"
    Cost: 2WB
    P/T: 1/2
    Card Type: Creature - Human Redneck
    Rules Text-
    Sacrifice a Redneck: Target non-Redneck creature gets -2/-2 until end of turn.
    (2): Target Redneck Child gets +1/+2 until end of turn
    Flavor Text:
    "Shucks, Polly, I'll take lil' RayRay to school. We's in the same grade anyways."

    ---------

    "Rural Mob"
    Cost: 1WBR
    Card Type: Enchantment
    Rules Text: If you control seven or more non-Child Rednecks, and one or more Shotguns or Pitchforks, each Redneck you control gains "{TAP}: Destroy target enchantment or artifact"
  2. Waldtyr New Member

    Hahahahahaha, proper fun !

    For some stupid reason this makes me think of Sergeant Hartmann (Full metal jacket)
    My impression of a card on him would be something like:

    ''Sergeant Hartmann''
    Cost: 2RG
    P/T: 2/2
    Card type: Creature - Drill instructor
    Rules text: All Rednecks gain +1/+1 and haste. When Knob Kreek shooting range comes into play Sergeant Hartmann is unblockable.
    Flavour text: ''Up and over Numbnuts ! Act like you got a pair!''
  3. Budget Player Cadet Where in the world is BPC

    ROFL! I totally get that. I went to texas once, and I honestly (no offense here) got the feeling that I was one of the only people with reading and writing skills within a five-mile radius. :D :D :D

Share This Page