Ransac/Monkey 2004 Q & A forum

[Killer Joe]

What is your position on the slang terminology of being a "Monkey's Uncle"?

Also, do you think that one of the reasons for the downfall of society is due to Hollywood's money grubbing making of movies like: Planet of the Apes.

And what Michael Jackson's Monkey? Chuckles?

And how about those TBS shorts where monkeys are used to re-create famous movies?

 

[Ransac]

What is your position on the slang terminology of being a "Monkey's Uncle"?

We stand firm that this "slang" is often used as an act of racism. Therefore, under my campaign, anyone caught using this term shall be sentenced to death........ by nematoads.


Also, do you think that one of the reasons for the downfall of society is due to Hollywood's money grubbing making of movies like: Planet of the Apes.

*Ransac hides a bag of money*
I have no idea what you're talking about. Planet of the Apes was a GREAT movie, as was the next movie: Planet of the Playmates!



And what Michael Jackson's Monkey? Chuckles?

His name is Bubbles and he is being considered for Secretary of War.

And how about those TBS shorts where monkeys are used to re-create famous movies?

I loved those shorts. They correctly depict what REALLY happened in history, such as the REAL William Wallace(real name Bobo) actually shooting lighting bolt out of his oink.




Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[train]

What is your stand on the importing and exporting of monkeys in wooden crates or steel cages? Is this the best way to "move" these items?

What kind of wallpaper would you put in the white house?...

Also, would the rose garden remain full of roses, or would it become the banana botanical gardens?...

 

[Ransac]

What is your stand on the importing and exporting of monkeys in wooden crates or steel cages? Is this the best way to "move" these items?

Believe it or not, monkeys are very comfortable traveling in these cage accomodations. To live out this experience, that how I travel throughtout my campaign. But, I'd prefer it if you didn't refer to monkeys as "items"


What kind of wallpaper would you put in the white house?...

Does it matter? Monkey feces is going to cover it anyway.


Also, would the rose garden remain full of roses, or would it become the banana botanical gardens?

No, it will remain the rose garden. My running mate wishes for his room to be moved to the banana depository, though.




Ransac, cpa trash man

 

[train]

Once you are elected - will there be a BYOF&T party?! (Bring your own fruits and termites)

Will you introduce legislation that makes it legal to fondle strangers in public - for purposes of social grooming - or dining - in the case of fleas, etc...?

Do you have any memories of Jane Goodall you'd like to share with us?...

 

[Ransac]

Once you are elected - will there be a BYOF&T party?! (Bring your own fruits and termites)

No. We have opted for a more traditional FYOP party (Fling Your Own Poop).


Will you introduce legislation that makes it legal to fondle strangers in public - for purposes of social grooming - or dining - in the case of fleas, etc...?

It's not legal already?????!!!!!!!????? THIS IS A SOCIAL OUTRAGE!!!!! I INTEND ON MAKING THIS THE PRIME FOCUS OF MY CAMPAIGN AND WILL INACT THIS IN THE FORM OF A BILL TO BE LEGALIZED THE INSTANT I AM ELECTED!!!!!!



Do you have any memories of Jane Goodall you'd like to share with us?

No. She's a hack and a fraud.



Ransac, cpa trash man