It's almost time to vote.....

R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
...and you should ask yourself "Who should my vote go to?"


Well, look no further!!!! Allow me to compare the candidates!

George Bush: Brain filled with mispronuniciations and Bar-B-Q sauce. Enjoys beating up hippies in his spare time. Michael Jackson is avid supporter of "No Child Left Behind" Act. Running Mate has full time heart surgery team around at all times to "fight the effects of the Big Macs"

John Kerry: Brain filled with longwindedness and head filled with Botox. Enjoys burning flags and eating babies in his spare time (I HAVE PROOF [not really]). Gumby is avid supporter of Botox, but still won't vote for Kerry. Running Mate requires a restraining order to stop hugging him.

Ralph Nader: His name is Ralph Nader.




and now, the RIGHT choice to vote for!!!!!

Ransac: Brain filled with witty commentary and even intellect to place himself in top 15% of his class and recieve academic scholarship. Enjoys beating hippies with spoons and making fun of Michael Moore's fifth chin in his spare time. Ransac is an avid supporter of the Monkies' Suffrage Movement. Running Mate requires a team of pooper scoopers (just in case ;D).

Additionally, Ransac still has an outstanding collection of monkey fetish pornography{Which he will share with everybody if elected president}, will not be COMPLETELY responsible for the second coming of Jesus in which fifteen million peoples will lose their lives and/or toilet plungers, and has been infamous on this website for the past four years.



The credentials speak for themselves, people. The choice is clear.

So, vote for Ransac/Monkey 2004 for President on Tuesday...


...or you will go to hell.


I will now take any more question about my proposed administration.


Ransac, cpa trash man
 
1

13NoVa

Guest
sorry ransac, but the bushmaster still gets my vote.

i love bush, the plop.... and the president.
 
T

Tabasco

Guest
Jonathon Swift....damn you college english class...

If only his essay were more serious....it would be cool if he gave a baby-roast recipe

..."Today on cooking the kids"

we are gonna teach you today how to prepare a lovely thanksgiving alternative.....forget the turkeys...get yourself a baby to cook this year....
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
I don't go to college (school is evil and I want to avoid it for the rest of my life). I just read a lot. :rolleyes:

Seriously, though, A Modest Proposal happens to be one of my favorite pieces EVER. I'm reading Gulliver's Travels now (because I wanted to get rid of my change and they had a booksale at the library, okay? It's not like I normally read that sort of stuff in my spare time) but it isn't quite as good...
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Ah, but did you vote for the man with the spam: Ransac?


If you didn't, the rabid testicles with eat you alive.



Ransc, cpa trash man
 
R

Rooser

Guest
I still can't choose between Halo 2 and Unhinged. I think they'd both make good presidents.
 
1

13NoVa

Guest
beer is good, but bush is good. It's even better if they shave.

oh we're talking the MAN...

bush is still good.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Gentlemen......and the two ladies that frequent this site, I am pleased to announce that I have won the primaries to run on the Primate ticket again.


You see, the primate primaries take place almost immediately after the previous election, so as to ensure that everyone knows who the candidate is for the next election.


RANSAC/MONKEY 2008!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


ransac, cpa trash man
 
T

train

Guest
So what is on your next agenda...

any flinging poo during the campaign planned?
 
Oversoul

Oversoul

The Tentacled One
You might have my vote this time. We will have to see about what the Giant Squid Party has planned...
 
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