How to Impulse like......

D

Duel

Guest
An old Dojo thread, for anyone who doesn't know, describe how someone impulses, either a famous person or someone you know.


For instance
How to Impulse like David Zadok Stroud:
Draw 4 cards. Look at the 4 land you drew. Look at the 6 land in your hand. Take the island and concede. Complain how lucky Russell is in this game, and how your deck crushes everyone else.

How to Impulse like Sean:
Draw 4 cards. Take the impulse. Put the rest on the bottom of your library. Cast 2 accumulated knowledges and a fact or fiction. Cast Dominating Licid and attack 20 times. Win.

How to Impulse like Slick:
Pay G. Discard impulse. Say "fog". Pretend you lived through this turn.
OR
Look at the top 4 cards. Find no land. Look at your two land on the board. Look at the Reya, Stratadon, Serra Angel, and Blessed Wind in your hand. Nod sagely and pretend you have a solution. When they win, shrug and explain you were landscrewed. Up your land count to 16....

How to Impulse like Justin:
Draw 4 cards. Cast Juggernaut, bolt, bolt. Force of will your opponent's next spell. Beat a t2 deck with a deck based around 4 chain lightnings and 4 lightning bolts.
 
A

Apollo

Guest
Someone should do an article on "How to impulse like a CPAer."

But not me. I'm not funny.
 
H

Hetemti

Guest
How to Impluse like Hetemti

Topdeck Implus, Draw four, (Island, Island, Island, Morphling), curse the gods for giving you Impulse and not Fact or Fiction. Choose Island (The third one, with the Gallegos Tempest art), cast Mind over Matter, bury the top ten cards of my library and deal 20 to my opponent.
 
S

Spiderman

Administrator
Staff member
Not these again!

The original on the Dojo was slightly amusing, but then less-talented people got ahold of it and it became tiresome...

Not that I'm saying they can't be good here... ;)
 
I

Istanbul

Guest
How to Impulse like Istanbul

Tap to play Impulse at the end of your opponent's turn. Look at the top four cards of your library (Counterspell, Morphling, Treasure Trove, Dissipate (you've been yanking Islands out of your library with Thawing Glaciers)). Seize the Morphling. Serve Morphling Beatdown with all the Islands you've been stealing. Shake your opponent's hand, and shuffle for the next ten minutes because you've snagged all the Islands from your library.
 
Z

Zadok001

Guest
No, no, no.

How to Impulse Like Istanbul:

Draw four cards. Pick the one you need for your lastest collection. Put it into your binder, and shuffle the rest into your library, along with your hand, graveyard, and cards in play. Celebrate your completed set.
 
D

Duel

Guest
:) Working on some of my own here.... you'll see the result eventually....
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
How to Impulse like Mark "Ransac" Wanich
Draw 4 cards. Look at the Dwarven Pony, Mon's Goblin Raiders, Mountain, and Dwarven Pony. Think of why you built this crappy deck in the first place and take the Dwarven Pony. Put the other cards on the bottom of your library, thinking you have play a D. Pony, Just gotten a D. Pony, and put a D.Pony on the bottom, you won't get the other one soon. Begin your turn and draw a Dwarven Pony. Cuss like a pre-schooler.

EDIT: WOW!!!!!!! I must've been an absolute SCRUB at this point to not appreciate Dwarven Pony!!!!!!!!!!!!


How to Impulse like David "Prince RXI" Wanich
Draw 4 cards. Look at the 4 plains. Look at the 12 plains, 1 Island, and 1 Silent Attendant in play. Look and hand of 7 plains. Concede, saying that this deck sucks, vowing never to play with it again. Shuffle your deck and repeat process.




Ransac, cpa trash man
 
I

Istanbul

Guest
How to Impulse Like Mike Long.

Tap one Island. Cast Impulse. (1 card left in hand.) Draw the four cards. Drop them, apologize. Set one in your lap, slip one up your sleeve, sit on one, and draw one card. Pick up your deck. Fumble with the bottom few cards where your opponent can't see. Show a hand of two cards, and smile. From then on, whenever your opponent looks away (sneezes, is talked to by someone else), retrieve a card. Swear you already had that many cards in your hand. Die of a heart attack. Spend eternity in hell, where everyone is playing Tolarian Academy decks and you're playing a Treefolk theme deck.
 
H

HumanError

Guest
Nice reply, Istanbul. Fitting.

How to Impulse like Dustin "HumanError" Alexander...

Impulse at the end of your opponent's turn with an empty hand and a table full of land. Draw four cards: an Island, a Swamp, a Plains, and an Opt. Grab another Island and put the Opt at the very bottom of your library in disgust.
 
S

superguy

Guest
How to Impulse like Alex:

Look at the top 4 cards of your library. Take one and put the other three on the bottom of the library. Read Impulse over. Shuffle your library. Get a game loss for not knowing the errata. :)
J/K.
 
I

Istanbul

Guest
Originally posted by Zadok001
No, no, no.

How to Impulse Like Istanbul:

Draw four cards. Pick the one you need for your lastest collection. Put it into your binder, and shuffle the rest into your library, along with your hand, graveyard, and cards in play. Celebrate your completed set.
Click to expand...
No, no, no.

Istanbul would never have cards that belonged in his set in a deck. Never happen.
 
C

Captain Caveman

Guest
How to Impulse like Caveman:

Go to local mall. Stop in card shop. Buy a pack of Visions. Pull Nekrataal, Natural Order, Longbow Archer, Impulse and
some other random cards. Put them in the bottom of the Mal-Mart bag. Shuffle around looking for the car keys. Go home.
Hook to internet. Connect to the Dojo.
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
How to Impulse like Theorgg. Draw 4 cards. Take 1 card and put the rest on the bottom the library. Play the card drawn that is written on that states "You must play a Cheap-Ass Game". Take out Devil Bunny needs a Ham and enjoy.



Ransac, cpa trash man
 
R

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
At the request of my friend, here is an impulse for Spencer.


How to Impulse like Spencer "Sole Specter" Hollis:

Draw 4 cards. Look at the Counterspell, the Absorb, the Undermine, and the Counterspell. Look at your hand of 7 different counterspells. Look at the playing board of 1 plains. Look at the graveyard at the no land in there and say "#^$$, I concede". Then claim that this usually only happens against rebels and demand a rematch.




Ransac, cpa trash man
 
D

Duel

Guest
How to impulse like my brother adam:
Look at the top 4 cards of your library. Take the Undermine. Undermine my Gerrard's wisdom, so instead of being at 13, I'm at -2.
 
Z

Zadok001

Guest
No, no, no! Come on, Duel! You know your brother better than THAT...

How to Impulse Like Duel's Brother:

Draw four cards. Comment on each one individually for twenty minutes. Select a card. Put it into your hand, tap mana, and play it, all in one jerky, but uninterrupted motion. Say "Go" and "Hurry up" nearly simultaneously. :)
 
L

Landkiller

Guest
How to Impulse like Me :

Hey, wait, why am I playing blue? Oh well.


How to Worldly Council like me :

Look at the top five cards of my deck. Pick Gaea's Might, putting back Tribal Flames, Harrow, Draco, and Exotic Curse. Attack with Wayfaring Giant for exactly enough to kill.
 
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