Happy Thanksgiving!

S

Spiderman

Administrator
Staff member
For those who celebrate it...

It looks like I'll be trying to cook a turkey for the first time... :p
 
D

DÛke

Guest
...

Turkey is the BEST when you eat it only once a year. I hate turkey, but...in Thanksgiving, I somehow tend to like it...mmm...slow roasted turkey with honey glaze, soft herbs and spices injected to every slice...mmm...

...<sigh>...

Better than this Big Mac I'm trying to digest at the moment...
 
R

Rando

Guest
I just love ancient pagan hollidays that have been twisted into something more suitable so that people don't know that they are celebrating an ancient pagan holliday...

such as Thanksgiving,
or Easter
or Christmas
or Halloween...

It's fun!

So, let the ancient druidic pagan hidden deep inside of you out this year and don't celebrate Thanksgiving, celebrate the Festival of Harvest and the Autumn Equinox and pray that the gods grant you good health through the deadly winter that is to come.

Don't celebrate Christmas, but celebrate Saturnalia, a Roman high holliday thousands of years old that was held on December 25 in which people woud decorate trees and give each other gifts. Better yet, just celebrate the Winter Solstace, a practice even older.

Don't celebrate Easter, but celebrate a good, old fashioned Spring Festival/Vernal Equinox bash that sings the praises of the re-birth of the land after the Winter! Sure, it was ripped off by Christianity, but that's OK, we know the truth. ;)
 
C

Chaos Turtle

Guest
I'm with Rando! Guilt-free fun for everyone! :D

I can't wait for the part where we burn all the town's criminals (and innocents if we haven't got enough criminals) in a big wicker man!

Er... I mean,
Happy Turkey-Day!
 
S

Spiderman

Administrator
Staff member
Yeah, but who's a pagan nowadays? :)

Chaos Turtle, I haven't seen a reference like the wicker man since I read Lloyd Alexander's Prydain series... :p
 
R

Rando

Guest
My wife was Wiccan, but she really does not practice anything anymore.

Witches are sexy...
 
P

Prince RXI

Guest
Uh, Wickens are not witches. A wicken uses the power to heal, where a witch uses the power to hurt. Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving! May you all burst inside and out from too much turkey inhallation!





Prince RXI, Peace on Earth and good will towards... wait, thats New Years... Oh well, happy holadays!
 
Z

Zero T Katama

Guest
*wishes to point out that RXI's ending quote started out with a Christmas reference, not New Year's*
 
P

Prince RXI

Guest
*wishes to point out that the phrase is said just after the ball drops on New Years also.
 
R

Rando

Guest
*wishes to point out the witch and wiccan are synonomous and the spells can be used for any purpose. As I said, my wife was a practicing wiccan...I think she knows what she's talking about.*

...and witches are still sexy.
 
A

Apollo

Guest
Happy Thanksgiving!

Apollo notices everybody staring at him.

Ohhh no! You aren't getting any drumsticks from this bird!
 
Z

Zero T Katama

Guest
Mmmmm... Dining on Phoenix Drumsticks.... Perhaps even more Tainted than a Feast of the Unicorn?

*Doesn't care, and sharpens his utensils*
 
F

fuzzy510

Guest
You can't eat him without killing him! :rolleyes:

*Fuzzy510 whips out his magic shotgun, and hits Zero T Katama in the head. :D

Hey, Apollo, you owe me one. Big time. :D
 
T

terzarima

Guest
What are you guys talking about, I had my thanksgiving last month!!

Hehe... Stupid Americans :)
 
Z

Zadok001

Guest
*sigh* I'm a moron.

Sayth the school - "Thou shalt have class the day before Thanksgiving!"

Sayth Zadok001 - "I shalt buy a train ticket for Thanksgiving morning, then!"

Sayth the students, come the day before Thanksgiving - "We shalt now abandon the school!"

Sayth Zadok001 - "I'm alone in Calculus. Literally alone. What's wrong with this picture?"
 
Killer Joe

Killer Joe

New member
  • Counterspells
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  • My Wife letting me play a kids game <so says she>

Okay, My school has This Thursday and Friday off, right, that's normal. But, we also have Monday and Tuesday off for friggin Deer Hunting!!!!
I'm a city dude and know not or want not to know of things that go "boom", "flop", "Let's skin it!"

Now, here's an eating tip from the "Grand Master Flash" of T-Giving eating:
1.) Eat a full breakfast (and a nice lunch, too)
This allows your stomach to stretch a little for the turkey feast later. If you wait until suppertime to eat for the first time of the day (you know, I want to be good n hungry so I can stuff myself with turkey), that is crap! Just like an athlete has to stretch his/her body muscles for their activity, so does the well prepared "Turkey Devouer" me :).

2.) Stay away from the WHITE meat
That part of the Turkey is just way too dry and besides, all the girls and girl wanna-bes are going straight for it and you may be left out in the cold when tryin' to get some :(.

3.) Always, always have Cranberry sauce with your meal
This is great for the palete, some people prepare their turkeys with way too much sodium (salt) and the cranberry sauce helps to off-set the salty taste. Besides, your Aunt Gertrude will be impressed that you are now man enough to eat BIG PEOPLE food.

4.)What to drink, what to drink
NOTHING! Don't waste precious stomach space on liquid. You'll surely get filled up faster if you start with water, then that nasty tasteting wine your Uncle Bert brought that his friend from Guatamala made himself (you know, stepping on it with his BARE FEET!!! Yuk). Ask for a small glass of Ice water with a twist of lemon (It's that palate thing again)

5.)The pie
Now if you don't want to be accused of being "Un-American", then get yourself a Brittney Spears sized piece of Pumpkin Pie and heap on it some Cool Whip (tm) and whish all down with a hot cup of Joe. Don't even think about eating Cherry, or Apple, or <gag> Minced Meat pie at Thanksgiving, what're you, NUTZ!?!

6.)Seconds
Sure, why not? Unless, the 'girlfriend' is there or a potential date/mate. Should she get an idea that she'll have to cook for you after witnessing how you massacared that turkey, it's all over.

7.)Wanna "WOW" the Family
Pick up your own dish and the dish of the Manliest Man in the house and take them out to the kitchen. Big brownie points with Grandma, your spouse and especially, your MOM. <maybe more $$$ for Magic cards, hmmmmmm>

8.)Wanna really "WOW' the Fam
Play with the small children before and after the dinner. Show 'em how to play Magic or Harry Potter. Watch out for the pot shots taken at you from your beer-drinking brother-in-law and/or Church going "Aunt Annie" <you know this type, the "BIBLE THUMPER">

9.)Always go outside to Fart
Nothings worse than the idiot who ate way too many helpings of Broccoli or onion dip and lets out a silent but deadly one that almost assuredly gets blamed on the "Gamer" of the family.

10.)Thank the person whole-heartedly who made this wonderful meal
Last night while you checking out the new T2 deck Tech or playing some unfathomable Magic variant, this person was taking the time to cut, with pathagrium percision, the veggies, the stuffing and all of those goodies. So a simple "thank-you" goes a long way.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving :)














"This has been a parody post and is not officially endorsed by the CPA/Wizards of the Coast/or the Dieticians of America. Remember, eat responsibily"
 
N

nodnarb24

Guest
This year, we are eating Thanksgiving lunch instead of Thanksgiving dinner since almost every one in the family works 3pm-11pm tomorrow (today now) (including me). Work suck, turkey good, money better (you can buy turkey).
 
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