Here is my funny band story. It also led to my first, and only, suspension while in high school. Keep in mind that I went to a small high school in Ohio, that had a good show band (we were invited to France for their Bicentennial, but couldn't raise the funds).
Being a freshman tuba player, I wanted to hang out with the cool senior tuba and the percussion section leaders. They mentioned to me a tradition they had of getting drunk before a football game against a certain school. Wanting to impress my new role-models, I asked to go with them. It was agreed that I could go if I could get alcohol. A few hours later, we have a bottle of peppermint schnapps (reminiscent of drinking a LOT of Scope) and a six pack of Bud. Wow! Did that make for a nasty combination!
Fast forward a few hours and much drinking later, and I am in uniform and in a chair in the bandroom, coat thrown over my face, as the light hurt my eyes. After evacuating my stomach on the band room floor, I was poured onto the bus.
A one-hour nap and bus ride later, and we were at the game.
Half-time rolled around, and the show began. I could stand on my own by this time, but only just. In addition, my school didn't have the wraparound Sousaphones, just the smaller tubas that could be carried on your shoulder -- making one very top heavy. The show that year featured the tuba section, generally in the middle of the field. Lucky me was on the 50 yard line for about half the show, walking up and down, backwards and forwards, with a few flashy dips, besides. Behind the tubas was the percussion line -- far enough away not to run into, but close enough to hear their comments -- and laughter.
My playing skills were never the best when at my peak, and being drunk and a new tuba player, I was far from my peak. In fact, I pretty much forgot where I was going except for the most general of locations. As such, my memories of that particular show consist of being pushed and pulled by the tuba players on either side of me for the evening, while the drum line laughed on... luckily, the real band director was in Columbus, as he was a judge for the state band competition taking place the next day.
Saturday morning finally gets there, and we hop on the buses we had the night before. It turns out one of my companions had vomited on his bus the night before. And in the heat of the Saturday, crammed onto a bus full of people, it was just awful to smell. Luckily (for me) the rifles and flags took that bus to State.
Upon arrival there (a looooong four hour trip), we got yelled at by the real director and performed. I think we got a two. The following Monday had us all called to the office and subsequently serving a week inschool and a week's out of school suspensions.
A funny side note involves my only-child friend and fellow tuba player. His parents videotaped EVERYTHING he did in school, but that particular footage mysteriously disappeared, a shame really, as I have always wanted to see just how bad it was.
This does not condone drinking to excess, nor does it recommend it. It just relates what happened. Such is life. Though not funny at the time, I chuckle about it today.
