T
train
Guest
Author Name: Tony Boydell
Article Description: A Song For Europe
Article Type: Humour
Bonjourno, Wilkommen, Bonjour, and Bien Venu...
Howdy.
Seeing as I can't win anything CCG related, not even for toffee, I've decided to put my energies into a more lucrative and, given the general state of the Industry nowadays, easier pastime - that of writing songs. Of course, to ensure I exploit a market already burgeoning with potential clients (and to get this article published in the bloody first place - darn those web site 'thematic' policies), the subject matter shall remain Magic: The Gathering related.
Track One: "Bad 'Tog, Dirty 'Tog; Get Into Your (Snake) Basket!"
(to the tune of MAD DOGS AND ENGLISHMEN by Noel Coward)
The tournament scene has recently been a bore
When all of the players eschew
All the colours except black and blue
It's an archetype with too much hype for sure
Because the deck is so consistent
And one must avoid it's persistent lure
Floata-mana, floata-mana, floata-mana do
Floata-mana, floata-mana, floata-mana do
Digga-digga, fact-or-fiction too
Digga-digga, fact-or-fiction too
A player grieves when opponents' 'heaves resolve
Because it makes me want a revolv-er
Chorus:
Bad 'Togs and Englishmen
Scrub out in the early rounds
The Japanese like Green/Blue
The Chinese love Braids too
Hindus and Argentines applaud some fertile Grounds
But Englishmen hog Zevatog
In the Pyrinees there are C.O.Ps
To protect you from the pain
In the heart of Texas there are combo decks us
Britishers won't entertain
The 'Day Two' pairings get an airing
No limey's, there, are found
Coz bad 'Togs and Englishmen
Scrub out in the early rounds
Track Two: Just Another Sucker on The Vine Trellis (Instrumental)
Track Three: Our House by Madness (incorp. loads of Madness spells)
Father draws his Squirrel Nest
Mother's cast a Gurzigost, the kids are playing Chrononaughts
Sister's mise-ing in Round 2
Brother's got a PTQ and can't hang around
Chorus:
Our cards, in the middle of our decks
Our cards, in the middle of our…
etc to fade
Article Description: A Song For Europe
Article Type: Humour
Bonjourno, Wilkommen, Bonjour, and Bien Venu...
Howdy.
Seeing as I can't win anything CCG related, not even for toffee, I've decided to put my energies into a more lucrative and, given the general state of the Industry nowadays, easier pastime - that of writing songs. Of course, to ensure I exploit a market already burgeoning with potential clients (and to get this article published in the bloody first place - darn those web site 'thematic' policies), the subject matter shall remain Magic: The Gathering related.
Track One: "Bad 'Tog, Dirty 'Tog; Get Into Your (Snake) Basket!"
(to the tune of MAD DOGS AND ENGLISHMEN by Noel Coward)
The tournament scene has recently been a bore
When all of the players eschew
All the colours except black and blue
It's an archetype with too much hype for sure
Because the deck is so consistent
And one must avoid it's persistent lure
Floata-mana, floata-mana, floata-mana do
Floata-mana, floata-mana, floata-mana do
Digga-digga, fact-or-fiction too
Digga-digga, fact-or-fiction too
A player grieves when opponents' 'heaves resolve
Because it makes me want a revolv-er
Chorus:
Bad 'Togs and Englishmen
Scrub out in the early rounds
The Japanese like Green/Blue
The Chinese love Braids too
Hindus and Argentines applaud some fertile Grounds
But Englishmen hog Zevatog
In the Pyrinees there are C.O.Ps
To protect you from the pain
In the heart of Texas there are combo decks us
Britishers won't entertain
The 'Day Two' pairings get an airing
No limey's, there, are found
Coz bad 'Togs and Englishmen
Scrub out in the early rounds
Track Two: Just Another Sucker on The Vine Trellis (Instrumental)
Track Three: Our House by Madness (incorp. loads of Madness spells)
Father draws his Squirrel Nest
Mother's cast a Gurzigost, the kids are playing Chrononaughts
Sister's mise-ing in Round 2
Brother's got a PTQ and can't hang around
Chorus:
Our cards, in the middle of our decks
Our cards, in the middle of our…
etc to fade