YJ: The Killer Wasp!

Killer Joe

New member
I, the mighty YJ, Killer of all that is mundane and silly, am challenging "theorgg" to do Battle!
YJ starts to head toward the dosile beast and plans on attacking via theorggs cloth breech (only danger awaits!)

<a word from our sponser>
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Let's hear a testimonial from one of the many "Are You Talking!?" users, Little Sally Woo from Yohoo, Mich. writes:
Dear Blamoo Co. (Makers of "Are You Talking"), I want to let you know that when I finally get out of this detention site my folks put me in, I'm gonna mow all of you down with a pair of nail scissors!
Here's another from Johnny Jingle from Soot, Arizona
Dear B**t*rds, If they EVER let me out of the PEN, You're all dead.
That's right folks, we have many more interestinf testimonials for you hear but we'd rather you run out to your local store and buy some "Are You Talking!?", TODAY!











<legalese stuff: This is a parody advertisement and yadda, yadda, yadda,....>
 

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Ransac here, you favorite commentator, commentating on the battle about to take place. Along side me as always is the, um, uncontrollable K9Archmage. Well, it looks like everything is about to get under way. YJ is walking towards theorgg's cave to challenge him. He's walking and, OH, he trips. That's gonna cost him. He gets back up and dusts himself off. THis is turning into a terrfic show, isn't it K9? K9? Hello? I think he's drinking too much yoo-hoo. Once again, this match-up is brought to you by "Are you talking", the wonderful device that makes you ask yourself "are you talking". Back to the fight, Yj is still walking towards theorgg's cave. I don't think he realized that theorgg's cave is fifteen miles away. More on this match after this commercial break.



Ransac, cpa trash man
 
K

K9Archmage

Guest
Ok. While YJ is walking the 15(or was it 1500?) miles to Orgg's cave, he is attacked by ravenous,bloodthirsty,destructive... nature show hosts. It seems that they are doing a show on bees. of course, YJ and his ego decide to stick a round for a while. Nothing more. Now, back to Ransacless.

Hoipa
 

Killer Joe

New member
I have wings. I will be FLYING toward theorgg's cave. 15 kilometers is the distance (which is really to say Kilometers aren't cool enough to be full blown miles, yeah America!)
YJ ducks out of the way of the Nature Show's Hosts' net only to run into the rear end of the Drummer from the Count Basie's Big Band who happens to be in the middle of the desert playing, "April in Paris" :)

<Brought to you by the Blamoo Co., the makers of "I don't Give a Flying ****" and "Are You Talking!?">
 
P

Prince RXI

Guest
And JOINING K9Archmage and Ransac as a one night commentator is.....ME! Prince RXI will also be commentating on this fight! I am ALSO the rule maker of this match! The rules are as follows.

RULE 1:
No Punching, Kicking, or Bitting, BELOW THE BELT!
RULE 2:
No Pulling of Wings, Hair, Antenni, or Fingers!
RULE 3:
This Is A Fight TO The Death!
RULE 4:
No Summoned, Spell Made, or TV Creatures Permitted!
RULE 5:
I Am Open To Bribes!

Oh, and the odds on Yellow Jacket winning are 7/1.
Place you bets here fokes!




Prince RXI, One of the Commentators and the Rule Maker and Enforcer for the fight! <Brought to you by Blamoo Co., the makers of "I don't Give a Flying ****" and "Are You Talking!?">
 
A

Apollo

Guest
Boy, this is gonna be a short fight. I predict that YJ will be thwocked with a fly swatter (from Orgg's breechcloth, of course!) in the opening seconds of the fight.
 

Killer Joe

New member
...is playing while Yellowjacket is approaching the theorgg's cave.
YJ looks over his shoulder at the now three commentaters and tells them to, "Buzz-Off!"
Rminding spectores that YJ is as big as a real WASP (and I don't mean Jerry Fallwell), his plan is now to enter theorgg's floppy ear and buzz him from the inside out! Bwhahahahahahahaha! <ack!> I mean, Buzzbuzzbuzzbuzzzzzz!

<Insert Cheesy Organ music ala' Old Soap Opera style>

Will this be the end for theorgg?
Will YJ try to take over the World?
And, what about Johnny?
<Johnny (in a seriously thick Brooklyn accent): I'm still waitin' to get outta da PEN here, to Kill Youse Blamoo people!>

<insert Cheezy announcer voice>
Untillllllll nnnnnnext time we meet again, remember to keep your teeth clean and don't talk to anyone nicknamed named, "Snooty Face"!
 

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Ransac, here again, with your up-to-minute report. Well, after using his wings to narrowly escape defeat, YJ runs into a swarm of living, flying, goblin poo. YJ is having difficulty keeping flight and, OHHH, he gets hit right in the face. That's gonna cost him. That's portion is brought to you by snacky smores, the delightful chocolate coated chocolate bar with chocolate frosting. Well, it appears that after several hours of attempting to not be beat up by passing strangers, YJ has traveled a good, oh, I'd say eight feet. YJ might lose this battle before theorgg gets his shot at YJ. Well, that's all now. Oh yeah.


*Ransac shoots Prince Rxi*

It's K9Archmage's and my duty to commentate on this event. Go report a parade.










eat snacky smores







Ransac, cpa trash man
 

Killer Joe

New member
This is the toughest battle I ever had to fight what with long distance traveling, annoying announcers and dodging Goblin POO!
Okay, theorgg, you win! I can't take the your sneaky tactics anymore!
0-1-0
Next Weekend: Apollo!
 

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
It appears that YJ is throwing down his weapons and is walking away. THEORGG WINS WITHOUT A FIGHT!!!! Join us next week when K9 and I commentate YJ's efforts at Apollo.



Ransac, cpa trash man
 
T

theorgg

Guest
As the yellow one walks away, The Orgg appears from out from behind a large pile of monkey poo.

[me] reaches into his breechcloth and pulls out a can of woopass, looks at it, puts it back and brings out a rare speicies of atog: The Pattletog! Shaped like an oar of the legendary boat The Argo(and possible an atog that attempted to eat one of the oars of The Argo) it eats nothing in it's motionless existance. Untill NOW![/me]

AAAAAAaaaaaahhh!

[me] runs at Yellowjacket, Hurling the paddle-shaped Atog around his head as if it was a War Club.[/me]

**SMACK!**

Yellowjacket is dazed by the atog's face, and his stinger breaks off in the Atog's teeth!!
 
T

theorgg

Guest
[me] grabs Yellowjacket by the head and holds him around the torso[/me]

You DARE Challange one of the creators of the Battle Arena? Are you a fool?

--Mr. T, who walks out from behind Orgg's outstreached arm: I Pity Da FOOL!!!

Back to where you came from, My Duckman.*

[me] reaches into his breechcloth and finds a large spatula as Yellowjacket's eyes bug out of their bases.[/me]

WITH THIS SPATULA I DO DECLAIR, BRING FORTH THE ONE WHOE DOST NOT CUT HIS CAPITAL HAIR! WITH THIS SPATULA AND CAN OF INVISIBLE SPAM-- YANCOVIC COME HERE TO MY SIDE NOW FALL!


Weird Al Yancovic falls with his accordian to Orgg's side.

--Mr. T, again walking out from behind Orgg: Play Polka, FOO!

Back, Lawrence! I'm the one who is narrating this beating.

Let's Polka!!!



*GASP! A POKE'ALLUSION!
 
T

theorgg

Guest
*Weird Al strikes a pose and begins wailing ans squeezing his squeezebox as theorgg claps his hands three times for silence with stingerless Yellowjacket still clamped in his hands.

*Yellowjacket is now very disorented

*Weird Al sings the following as theorgg dances by slapping his hands together, on his hips, the bottoms of his feet, his breechcloth, his exposed buttox and other very unpleasent to be smashed against places like his underarms: OH! Twist away, twist a- way at the gates of steel! Unlock the SEcret voice! Give in to Ancient Noize! Put a toothpick down your pants-- But Man is Real! Not made of... Hot Cha, where are you? every body's eyes are closed. I can't tell why... Corpses on Rotisserries Turn! Piles of Bodies Burn and Burn! VLAD! VLAD! VLAD THE IMPAILER! VLAD! VLAD! YOU KNOW HE's Gonna Get Ya!...A Quart of Milk, Loaf of Bread! Man is his life Really sad! Got a wife and some kids! Man this guy's on the skids! Lookout here comes the married... Pizinoes! It's the Super Mario Brother's Super Show! Were the Mario Brothers, and plumming's our game! We're not like the others who get all the... Romeo and Julet are together for eternity! Com'on Baby! Dont' fear the reaper! Take My... Money. Nothing is quite as beautiful as Cash! Some people say It's Folly, But I'd rather the Lolly-- 'cause with money you can make a stash... of lead fills his opponents full of dread! Does he think at all, Or if he mooves will he... smoked cannibus? Hit a bong like some of us? Drove a tye-dyed microbus ans subscribed to... The MaCHHIIIINNNE! Where have you Been? It's Alright, we know where YOU've... thrown ours down, which is what we did, drove back to the church to have a thanksgiving dinner that couldn't be beat and didn't get up untill the next morning when we got a phone call from awwficer opie. He said Kid, we found your name on an envelope at the bottom of a half-ton pile of garbage and we wanted to know if you had any information about it and I said Opie, I cannat tell a'h lie, I put that envelope at the bottom of that half ton of... Ugly, ugly, ugly ugly. UGLY UGLY UGLY UGley! Iiiiht's TIIIMME! Lean on the fire, get yourself on fire feelin' HOT HOT HOT! A hundred people burning and getting real HOT HOT HOT! what to DOOOOOOO on a night like... Summer! Schoool's OUt Fo' EVER! Blooooow the school to PIECES! School's Out for
Scoool's out for Schoools out fooooooooOOOOOOOOOrrrr EEEEEEeeeeeeEEEEEEeeeeVEEEERRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!


[me], sweating profucely from dancing five streight minutes and red from his slaps( not to mention the near-unconcience and [now]smelly Yellowjacket) stops and asks"[/me]What was that one called, Al?"

*Weird Al says "It's the Napster Polka. Unfourtunatly, BMG wouldn't let me relese it-- They don't like the Alice Cooper ending.

That's a pity. I expecially like the way you incorporated GWAR with everything else. Very nice, as usual. Put that one into Napster, If you can.

I cannot confirm nor deny my allegence to Napster, according to my record company. Just let's keep my CD collection out of the discussion.

Alright.
and now for the Legal Text


***This has been a parody of Weird Al Yancovic's skill at splicing together Lyrics and the fact that he has several good, unrelesed songs floating around on Napster like Green Eggs and Ham and I Won't Eat Prunes Again!. I didn't mean to deface anyone's stuff. It was for fun. gotme?
 

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
Ransac, here. I was on the pot and heard that theorgg ambushed and demolished YJ. Does this mean that YJ will be fit to fight Apollo, or will it be Triple Threat between all three, seeing as how theorgg won. More on this topic later.



Ransac, cpa trash man
 

Ransac

CPA Trash Man
*Ransac takes the opportunity and whacks YJ with his microphone while he's bandaged. Suddenly, YJ turns around and attacks Ransac. Ransac pushes a button for help and.............Y2J COMES OUT!!!!!*


Y2J, Chris Jericho, of of WWF comes out and attacks YJ. Y2J vs YJ!!!!!!!!! Jericho attacks YJ and, what's this? Jericho is putting the Walls of Jericho(puts opponents upside down and squeezes his/her head against the ground). YJ is submitting!! YJ gives up!! Is this a new rivalry? Will, Y2J be a factor in YJ vs. Apollo? Find out on PAY-PER-VIEW!!!


*Manager whispers into Ransac's ears and tells him it's not on Pay-per-view*

Cheap place.





Ransac, cpa trash man
 
N

nodnarb24

Guest
[me]'s rats start to pray for YJ and YJ suddenly recovers with 50,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 times more strength then he has ever had in his life.[/me]
 
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