Goofy shiznit

I

Istanbul

Guest
Fruitcake 2B
Creature - Cake
0/1
B: Regenerate Fruitcake. If Fruitcake is dealt lethal damage this turn, put a +0/+1 counter on it at end of turn.
-
"Why is it that the more I eat of this stuff, the more there is?"

Beavis 2R
Creature - Legendary Idiot
3/1
If Beavis and Butthead are both in play, Beavis gets +1/+3.
1RR, T: Search your library for a card with the word 'Fire' in the title. Put that card into your hand.
-
"Heh heh...fire! FIRE!"

Butthead 2R
Creature - Legendary Idiot
1/3
If Beavis and Butthead are both in play, Butthead gets +3/+1.
RRR, T: Butthead deals 3 damage to target creature.
-
"Uh...huh huh....don't make me kick your @ss, Beavis!"

Skateboard 3
Artifact
2, T: Target creature you control gains first strike, trample, and haste until end of turn. Bury that creature at the end of the turn.
-
"Whoah! Dude, I'm going FAST! Now, if I can just figure out how to steer..."

Kyren Hooker 1R
Creature - Goblin
0/1
Sacrifice a creature: Target opponent gains control of Kyren Hooker.
At the end of each turn, any player that controls a Kyren Hooker card takes 3 damage.
-
You pay her NOT to go out with you.

Elvis 3W
Creature - Lord
2/3
When Elvis comes into play, choose a creature type.
All creatures of that type which you control get +1/+1.
-
He's not a king. He's THE King.

CPA Ban 2W
Instant
Counter target spell with a median Scrye value greater than $5.00. CPA Ban cannot be countered as it is being cast. (You must have a copy of the most recent issue of Scrye at hand to cast CPA Ban.)
-
"Let me get this straight. You own the Power 9, and drive a Pinto?"

Rabbit 2G
Creature - Rabbit
1/1
Tap two Rabbits you control: Put a Rabbit token into play. Treat this as a 1/1 green creature.
-
Wilt Chamberlain, eat your heart out.

Tyrannosaurus Rex 2GGG
Creature - Dinosaur
6/5
Trample
Fading: 2
-
"Holy crap, it's coming right for us...hey, what's that rock in the sky?"

Broken Time Card U
Instant
Choose one: Take another turn after this one; or both players shuffle their libraries, hands, and graveyards together and draw seven cards; or counter target spell. Target opponent chooses one: Kick target player in the balls; slap target player in the face; or bend target player over the table and re-enact Deliverance.
 
N

nanokill

Guest
Fabulous cards. the texts are great as are the card titles and abilities. Keep em coming:D
 
I

Istanbul

Guest
Anonymity 2U
Enchantment
All permanents lose Legendary status.
-
"Nicol who?"

Copy Enchantment 1UU
Enchantment
Choose an enchantment currently in play.
Copy Enchantment becomes a copy of that enchantment.
If an Enchant Creature spell is copied, you may choose a new creature for this spell to enchant.


[Edited by Istanbul on August 27th, 2000 at 03:54 AM]
 
D

DÛke

Guest
CPA 8
Legendary Artifact Creature
CPA costs 1 less to play for each Legendary creature in play.
CPA gains +1/+1 for each other Legendary creature in play.
Sacrifice a colored Legendary creature: Put 3 tokens into play. Treat those tokens as 1/1 Legendary Artifact Creatures.
6/6
"The CPA will grow until it could run over WotC itself!"

Get Some Imagenation UU
Sorcery
Target opponent must name all the cards in his or her hand he or she are planning to use on his or her next turn.
During the opponent's turn, the opponent can't play any cards except for the cards he or she named. If he or she doesn't play all the named cards, than you may draw up to 4 cards.
"Nope, you said you were going to play THAT, not THIS. Fine, go ahead, play whatever you want, I'll just draw THOSE..."

Card Makers 4
Artifact Creature
4, Tap: Target permenant becomes target permenant until end of the turn.
"You paid a lot for that didn't you? Well sorry, but all I have to pay for it is 4..."

Don't be Fooled by the Looks 2GG
Instant
Target creature gains +3/+3, and gains First Strike, Trample, and Flying. Untap that creature. That creature can't be the target of spells or abilities this turn. That creature gains "G: Regenerate."
Sacrifice the creature at the end of the turn.
"It's not small, see..."
 
R

Rando

Guest
Rain of Ointment
2UR
Sorcery
Destroy all Fungus and Insects, they can not be regenerated
Rain of Ointment deals 3 damage to you.

"Sure it burns a little, but it kills 'em don't it?"

Do ya get it? Huh? Huh? Do ya? Do ya get it? Huh?
Funny stuff..........
 
Z

Zadok001

Guest
Isty... I _love_ Broken Time Card. That's brilliant. :) Just brilliant...

DUke... Card Maker will spawn more errata and rulings that Lifeline! My God! That's... That's terrifying!
 
D

DÛke

Guest
Since I'm going to school:

Windsor High School
Legendary Land
Windsor High School comes to play tapped.
Tap: Add 1 colorless mana to your mana pool.
3: Target creature gains +1/+1, Flying, First Strike, or Trample until end of the turn.
4: Untap or tap target creature.

"We shall teach you what you ALREADY KNOW!:mad:"

And something esle:

Death of a Magic Player 10
Artifact
Death of a Magic Player comes into play tapped.
Tap, sacrifice Death of a Magic Player: Destroy all permenantes target player controls. That player looses 1 life for each permenant put into the graveyard this way.

"I'll rip your cards, I'll rip you, and I'll rip all TCGs"

There!:)
 
F

Firestorm

Guest
Monkey Spawning Pit
3G
Enchantment
Fading 7

When Monkey Spawining Pit is put into play, ewmove two target apes or monkeys from the game.
During Your upkeep and at the end of your turn, put a monkey creature into play. Treat it as a 2/1 green creature with rampage 2 which cannot be blocked by less than two creatures.

Breeding Season seems awefully long for the monkey inabitants of Uktabi this year...

Chaos Cloud
Enchantment
2R
Whenever a spell is cast to any target, Choose a taget of the appropriate type. Flip a coin, If that coin lands in your favor, the spell is redirected to the target you chose. If it lands in his favor, the spell is casted normally.
During Your upkeep put a Chaos counter on Chaos Cloud.
If the number of Counters on Choas cloud is even, all creatures get +1/-1, if odd all creatures get -1/+1. If the number of counters is divisable by 5, each player takes the top two cards of the other player's library and puts those cards into play under his/her control. If Chaos Cloud is target of a spell or abitlity, that spell or abilities controller loses three life and removes the top four cards of his/her library from the game.

Mogg Flood Alarm
5RR
Instant
Yuo lose 3 life.
Put 5 Pissed Off Goblin tolkens into play. Trest these as 1/2 red creatures that havemountainwalk and , TAP: Destroy target blue permanent or target island or this card deals 3 damage to target creature or player. These tokens don't untap as normal during your upkeep, you may sacrafice two mountains to untap it.

Rootwater Fire Alarm
5UU
Instant
You lose three life.
Put 5 Pissd off Merfolk Firefighter tokens into play. Treat these as 1/2 blue creatures with islandwalk and, TAP: Counter target red spell or destroy target mountain or destroy target red permanent. These tolkiend dont untap as normal during your upkeep. You make sacrafice two islands to untap this creature.
 
P

Phyrexian Pie-Eater

Guest
Swift Kick in the A$$
1RR
Instant
Kick target player in the butt for each creature he controls
"Yea, you know what else goes well with milk? A swift kick in the A$$"

Who's yer daddy?
2W
Instant
Destroy each creature if there aren't at least 2 of it's summon type in play(e.g. merfolk, goblin, ect.)
"Que es to papa?"
 
N

nodnarb24

Guest
Tag Guard

Pie-eater- the flavor text should be "Quien es tu papa"
 
P

Phyrexian Pie-Eater

Guest
Thats what i ment. stupid fact that i don't speak spanish well. Grrrrr i hate not being bi...lingual
 
I

Istanbul

Guest
Demonic Death of Evil Hatred BBB
Instant
Sacrifice target player.
"Hold your arm still, Bob...we gotta do what the card says!"
 
D

dw51688

Guest
I love you Isty, you keep everything so lively. Too bad I don't have your imagination. Wish I did though! (bows graciously at Istanbul's feet and kisses his shoes)
 
A

Apollo

Guest
ROTFLMFAO again! That is the most hilarious flavor text I've ever seen!
 
F

Firestorm

Guest
Bee Hive
4GG
Enchantment
GGG:put three Bee tokens into play. Treat these as 1/1 green flying creatures with haste. If any of these tokens attacks and is not blocked, defending player gets a sting counter(If a player had 15 or more sting counters at any time, he or she loses the game).
"Damn bees..."

Infestation of Termites
3GB
When Infestation comes into play, put three Termite tokens into play.Treat these as 0/1 green and black creatures and have first strike, trample, and "If this creature attacks and is not blocked, defending player sacrafices an artifact or non-basic land he or she controls".
1: Sacrafice a termite counter to put two Termite counters into play.
"Yea, I stepped on one the other day. Burnt a hole straight through the sole of my boot."

Elephant Stampede
5GGG
Instant
When Elephant Stampede comes into play, sacrafice all lands, all artifacts, and all creatues without flying you control.Put 3 Elephant Tokens into play. Treat these as 9/9 creatures with Haste, First Strike, and Trample into play.
Remove them from the game at end of turn.
"And they're off!"

Yawgmoth's Garage Sale
2BBBB
Sorcery
Set aside all permanents. Any player may pay any amount of life, mana, or combination of both life and mana for any permanent set aside this way. If a cards are bid for by any two or more players, any player may pay any amount of life, mana, or a combination of life and manathey want. Whoever bids the most for the permanent gains control of it. Any permanents not bid for are destroyed.
"Well aren't you gonna fight over it?"-Yawgmoth

Battle Axe of Crovax
1BBB
Legendary Enchant Creature
The creature this card enchants gains Protection from White, First Strike, Trample, +5/+5, and Rampage 2.
"... but, how the hell are we going to arrest him now?"-Kjeldoran Royal Guard
 
D

DÛke

Guest
<KEEP IN MIND THAT THIS CARD IS RESTRICTED>


Misinformation UUU
Instant
Counter target spell.
Search your deck for all copies of Misinformation, and put them in your hand. Shuffle your deck afterwards.
"Geeeez! Why ya gotta restrict the card! It's just an over-costed Counterspell now!"
 
T

Thrash Golem

Guest
Windsor High School would be soo broken


4: untap target creature

ok, i have 5 elves and a priest of titania

uhh
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top