An adventure

[Rando]

There was the city of Gromshire and there was the mist shrouded dangers of The Wood and that's all anyone knew.

Seventy years ago or some such as the elder folk told, when your grandparents were children, the populous of Gromshire awoke one cool and dark morning to find their city stranded from the rest of the world. All highways and trails leading away from the city came to a thick wood of strange timber and all routes to and from the kingdom-at-large disappeared into brambled walls denying any passage.

The Duke of Gromshire, Kithman Moorestaff Andromaphere III, Elder Thane of Gromshire, VIIC Lord of the line of Helmsley, following many, many seasons of unsuccessful exploration of the branching paths and labyrinthine hedgerows surrounding the city, declared himself Lord of the Hedge, King of the Wood, Master of Mazes and Forest Father. He proclaimed all lands within and without the city walls his rightful kingsake as lord of all creation.

It is now the 69th year of King Kithman's reign. He is eighty-nine years old and has more and more often in his lucid moments demanded his council of chamberlains find reason and pattern to the tangle of plants just beyond the city walls. Nine days ago a group of workman cut through a particularly difficult thicket to find a cobblestone path leading due east from Gromshire proper.

You are one of the esteemed adventurers of Gromshire asked by the City Chamberlains to explore this path.

(tell me your character's name, gender, a brief physical and personality description, the class/type/occupation you imagine your character to be, a little history and a hand-full of belongings your character is bringing with you. Please keep things within reason for a "low level character".

Talk amongst your selves about what you want your party to do, nominate a party leader and then have the party leader make a declaration. The declaration post should list each active character and what they are doing in the immediate future. Any post that is not the elected party leader making a declaration of intent for the rest of the party will be ignored by me. Those other posts should be the adventurers deciding amongst themselves how best to precede. Just make sure the party leader marks the declaration post with something like "OUR DECLARATION YOU FREAK. GOD WHY WONT YOU LISTEN TO US, JERK. I HATE YOU."

Consider Gromshire to be your typical medieval city, and all the institutions and amenities you normally think of in your average D&D city apply.

This is meant to be pretty free-form, intuitive and imaginative. Let's see what happens.)

Go!

 

[Spiderman]

Welcome back Rando!

Dorgath, male, young 5' stout dwarf with dark hair and full beard, curious but keeps to himself as he's a "youngin'", was in the family smithy business but got tired of it and wants to see the world, just has a warhammer which doubled as his smithy tool, a shield, chain armor, and a backpack.

 

[Mooseman]

Stoop, male human about 5'9" in his mid-20's with short black hair. He grew up in the slums an orphan, living the dodgy life, but was sentenced to serve in the army for his transgressions , where he learned military tacticsx and arms.
But after his 4 year stay, the pay offered was not enough to interest him and he would take his sword, dagger, leather armor and kit bag and find something more financially rewarding.

 

[turgy22]

Quotidian Slopwallow, male halfling aged 62 years who stands about 3 1/2 feet tall. He inherited his father's business as a pig farmer and brothelmaster of Slopwallow Estates, a pig farm / brothel. Unbeknownst to him, he is also a weresquirrel. Having been bit by a pesky cursed rodent some many years ago, he finds himself awakening the morning after each full moon upon a pile of nuts with no recollection of the previous evening.

Master Slopwallow (Quotid, to his friends) is a master debater and negotiator, and the most powerful weapon at his disposal is his sharp tongue and quick wit. Like all halflings, he has more acute senses than men and although slow of foot, is quite nimble. He always carries a sturdy cane, which serves well as a bludgeon on the rare occasions that one of his customers refuses to submit the proper payment for services rendered. He keeps a sling in his coat pocket and once used it hurl an acorn over 300m, hitting a squirrel square in the nuts. The nuts that the squirrel was holding in its mouth, that is.

Quotid joins this quest accompanied by his miniature donkey, Jorge, who is currently laden with a fortnight's supply of bread, ham and acorns.

 

[Oversoul]

Thialu Ethadran, Mycologist Extraordinaire
Elf (Rando never said anything about what races live in this city, but if we already have a dwarf and a halfling, I'm guessing elf is another possibility), female, young, medium stature.

Thialu really, really, really loves mushrooms. Animals and plants can go die in a fire for all she cares, unless they have mushrooms growing on them, in which case they serve a purpose, she supposes. Perhaps surprisingly, she doesn't mind people all that much and tries to get along with everyone. But people tend to avoid her, because all she ever wants to talk about are mushrooms. Her family is relatively well-off, consisting of skilled apothecaries and healers. Attempts to induct young Thialu into the family business have met only modest success. She has proven a quick study, but just doesn't have much enthusiasm for activities unrelated to mushrooms. Her family members have continued to train her and work with her out of a sense of familial duty, but they do not trust her to act as a full-time apothecary or healer because they are (rightly) worried that she might suddenly abandon her post and venture off outside the city to collect mushroom samples. Her family doesn't worry for her safety, in part because they tend to believe that the stories of danger in the woods are superstitious nonsense, but also because Thialu never seems to feel the need to venture particularly deeply and she always carries her trusty crossbow. No one, even among her immediate family, is sure quite how the young woman who was only ever obsessed with mushrooms and nothing else since childhood managed to find the time or inclination to become a skilled arbalist, but apparently it's a thing that happened. She can put a crossbow bolt right between a squirrel's nuts from 50 meters away, and that's not the nuts the squirrel is holding in its mouth. The elder members of Thialu's family are personal friends of some of the City Chamberlains, and they felt obligated to send one of their own along as a healer for the adventuring party. No one volunteered, so they collectively persuaded Thialu that she should go, because there might be new mushrooms to discover along the way.

Thialu will bring her backpack, rations made from mushrooms that she grew herself, various potions and salves that she brewed from mushrooms (using her own secret recipes), a blanket, rope, healing and apothecarial tools, a botanical compendium in case she is compelled to work with ingredients that are green and leafy (she tends to fail to remember the properties of herbs, having only memorized information pertaining to mushrooms), candles, a pocket mirror, flint and tinder, a kit for collecting and storing mushroom spores should she happen across any, a knife, her trusty crossbow, and crossbow bolts that have all been coated in various toxins derived from mushrooms.

Thialu is obsessed, but she isn't stupid. She realizes that she lacks experience and has no desire to be party leader. For now Thialu is focused solely on discovering new mushrooms for her collection and on keeping the other party members from succumbing to illness or injury, whether that means acting as a healer or putting poisoned bolts through the eyes of anything that threatens them.

 

[rokapoke]

Tiomar

Tiomar is an older human thief rogue "honest businessman" who is rather less than forthcoming about his past. He's in his mid-50s, bald as an egg (though with a salt-and-pepper beard), and looks rather weathered. He smokes like a chimney and and has a hefty potbelly, though he's deceptively quick and rather easily slides out of one's field of vision.

He carries his trusty pipe, several lockpicks, a long wooden staff ("I don't need no swords!"), and, in his words, "more throwing knives hidden in more places than you really want to think about," as well as four change purses that he swears all belong to him. He promises not to 'borrow' the purses of his fellow travelers.

[Out of character: Incidentally, I've never really done role-playing outside of computer games, so I may need a bit of guidance as we go through this.]

 

[Spiderman]

I nominate Stoop or Quotid as the Party leader.

rokapoke: It's pretty basic, especially as free-form as this. Just imagine yourself as your character and what he might do in whatever situations come up

 

[turgy22]

Quotid would be happy to lead the expedition. Shall we take a vote or wait for more players first?

 

[Oversoul]

...He inherited his father's business as a pig farmer and brothelmaster of Slopwallow Estates, a pig farm / brothel...

...He always carries a sturdy cane, which serves well as a bludgeon on the rare occasions that one of his customers refuses to submit the proper payment for services rendered...

It's a pimp cane! Your character's weapon is a pimp cane. It took me a while to get it. I don't know why I'm admitting that.

 

[rokapoke]

"Follow the pimp, eh? Well, it wouldn't be my first time..."

 

[turgy22]

"Pimp?! Sir, you insult me. I am brothelmaster and swinekeeper of Slopwallow Estates, a position of great esteem within this community. As I recognise you as a loyal Slopwallow customer, I will allow this offence to pass, but if it happens again, I may be forced to go upside your head."

 

[rokapoke]

"Hey, what I do with your pigs is my business, once I've paid my fee."

 

[Rando]

(Okay, Quotid has been nominated and accepted the position of party leader. I guess there's not much to react to yet, so I'll give you all a little more to go on. Then, Quotid, if you please, tell me in a declaration post what each adventurer is going to do.)

(Anyone who played my free-form games "back in the day" should know how this will work. [there might be two or three of you here] No stats, no dice rolls, just some playful interactive story-telling. If anyone else comes along and wants to join in just let me know and I'll squeeze you in somewhere/somehow)

Continuing the game:

The citizens of Gromshire most of adventuring spirit have heard and accepted the call of their king.

You all gather in the Blue Hall, the throne room of King Kithman within the granite walls of Castle Helmsley.

"My good men and women" the old king says, "I thank you for your service to the throne and to Gromshire. As the gods have granted me an unspoiled paradise over which to reign, so too have the gods chosen you to survey and catalog this land for me. The gods are wise, and know that no one man, no matter how kingly, mighty and magnificent, can complete all tasks on his own. Therefore, you all shall serve as my eyes, ears and hands outside of Gromshire's walls."

"In honor of your service" the old King continues, "and in payment of your service to Gromshire, I have opened the vaults of the castle to you. Please, take with you these gifts".

Two burly servants come out from behind King Kithman's throne and set down two large oaken chests. They stoop over to undo the latches, open the lids and step back so that you all may see the treasures within.

The stout containers hold:

Vyr: an enchanted, heavy broad sword. The wielder of Vyr must only wish it so to drain some of his or her own life force to feed the sword, granting the blade a much more powerful strike. This obviously leaves Vyr's master weaker at the end of a battle.

The Thuglan Scarf: The owner of this scarf can speak the controlling word to animate the simple-seeming strip of red cloth. When activated the scarf will act as another pair of hands. It can hold, manipulate, carry, throw, strangle or whatever else the master or mistress wishes. The only way to know the Thuglan Scarf's abilities is to test them.

Hawk and Sparrow: An enchanted, matched pair of short sword and dagger. The cut of there two blades is razor sharp. Once per day the master of the pair may wish the blades to defend him or her. For the duration of a single battle Hawk and Sparrow will float and fly through the air, defending their owner while her or she attends to other business. Unlike the Thuglan Scarf, Hawk and Sparrow will not travel far from the their owner.

The Marsaphile: This pink ceramic bottle contains an elixir which will cure the sick, heal the wounded and grant the living mighty physical powers for one day. The entire contents of the bottle must be consumed. At dawn on the next day the bottle will magically refill itself.

Keamao: This is a jade figure of a lion. Once per day, for the duration of one battle, the figure can be asked to transform into a real lion to fight at the defense of it's owner. Be warned: It is said that while Keamao is a fearsome and potent warrior he can be permanently killed. When this happens, the legends say the jade figure explodes in a fireball that none can survive.

1000 gold coins

5 healing potions that cure all injuries and illnesses

4 throwing daggers in the shape of eagle's talons that never miss the mark but disappear once used.

3 potions of invisibility which grant complete invisibility, including the sounds that the drinker makes, for one hour.

2 potions of fire breathing which grant the drinker one attack very much akin to a dragon's fire.

1 magic smooth green pebble that King Kithman insists is very powerful but no one knows how it is used.

[GAMEMASTER NOTE: I'll need to know how these items are divided amongst the party.]

 

[Oversoul]

"Not a single mushroom in the entire vault? What a waste of space. Well, I've never used a sword. I don't think I'd be much good at it. And I certainly have no use for lions. The Marsaphile sounds interesting. I have no idea how they make it refill. Some sort of enchantment. But the potion itself might originate in fungal ingredients. Once I travel far enough and collect enough samples, I'm going to make the greatest potions in the world. Maybe I'll invent a potion that can resurrect the dead!"

 

[rokapoke]

"Another pair of hands, eh? So I could be lifting four purses at once -- er, I mean, um...

"You've got no proof of anything!

"Also, I like me the sound of them throwing knives... where some is good, more is better."

 

[turgy22]

"Ah, blessed King! Your grace and generosity are beyond compare! We all live to serve you and your realm and shall indeed serve you well with these fine gifts you have bestowed upon us. As a small token of my appreciation, I give you my two stoutest wenches for your own personal enjoyment, as well as two pounds of fresh halfswine cheese, made of the finest milk taken from my pigs and maidens.

To the rest of the party, I propose the following rationing of items. If any member particularly desires to be the caretaker (for we are all just looking after the King's possessions here) of any item, please speak up and I shall do my best to arrange things suitably to meet everyone's needs.

To the Tall One, Stoop, I believe you can make the best use of the broadsword Vyr.

Dorgath, I believe the Hawk and Sparrow would be best utilized in your possession. They may help protect you while you are engaged with your hammer.

The Elven mistress may take the elixir. Its contents seem safe in her possession.

I had my eye on that stylish scarf, but I believe the red would clash with the fur trim on my overcoat. Tiomar may have it, as well as the throwing daggers, as he seems to be the only one here with any experience with such weapons.

I shall take the lion for myself (as it reminds me of an ugly guard pig I once tamed by the name of Mr. Stinkybottom) and the stone which I am sure a halfling of my wisdom and intellect will learn to use in short time. And if I fail to do so, then it shall make fine ammunition for my sling.

We shall each take with us a healing potion. Myself, Tiomar and Thialu will retain invisibility potions, while the dwarf and soldier take the potions of firebreathing.

Finally, I will keep this sack of gold safely on the back of Jorge so that we may all share in the King's riches. We will most assuredly need it for bargaining at some point and I believe it to be safest in the possession of an experienced proprietor such as myself. Er... not to be rude, but his majesty did say there were 1000 gold pieces. The bag feels a tad lighter than that..."

Quotid scowls at Tiomar.

 

[Mooseman]

Dragon breath eh? I think I have had that at time or two the morning after a rousing good time.
A broadsword.... well I guess I'm the only one that handle something that heavy.....

So which of you squibs has any range weapons? Bow, crossbow, sling, blowgun?
How about shields or bracers?
Food?

 

[Oversoul]

"Have no fears. I am an excellent cook. I make fried mushrooms, baked mushrooms, steamed mushrooms, smoked mushrooms, boiled mushrooms, broiled mushrooms, roasted mushrooms, grilled mushrooms, poached mushrooms, sautéed mushrooms, breaded mushrooms, and seared mushrooms. There's also mushroom soup, mushroom stew, mushroom chili, mushroom salad, mushroom cakes, mushroom kebabs, mushroom wafers, mushroom sandwiches, mushroom pie, cream of mushroom..."

 

[rokapoke]

"Mushrooms make me gassy... I may be the only one having a good time if we eat mushrooms for every meal."

 

[turgy22]

"I have brought plenty of ham and bread for our journey. Food should be the least of our concerns."