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Dorgath finds ten tightly sealed urns.

Ward moves northwest. (and the map didn't display his previous move)

Ward moves north.

We can distribute or entire party into some kind of trap most efficiently by making or initial moves with the entire party minus one of us. In other words, the entire party moves left (or west) except for Melkor's ghost. Then on our next turn, we all move up (or north) except for Pete. And so...

I'm in. Not sure if this game will translate well on a message board, but it's worth a shot. Don't worry, I know the rules and played on like two occasions, but I'm still going to be even worse than Turgy.

It's an HP. To be fair, the first set of problems were likely all caused by the motherboard flipping out and making tech support think that it was other parts that were defective, although I still think it says something that even after it was sent to their repair center, they still failed to...

Ward attempts to steer the dancing, udder-washing creatures in a northerly direction.

Haha, that happened. Well, kind of. Shortly after I spilled water on the keyboard, I was pretty sure that "W" and "F" weren't working, so I shut it down and tried to dry the keyboard out. But then I couldn't get the computer working again because the keyboard was messing with it, and I couldn't...

For those wondering why I still haven't updated this: I spilled water on my keyboard. I totally cannot afford this and was worried that something like this would happen. I will work out some sort of interim solution eventually...

The rogue graphemes have been suppressed. On my return to the office, I must report the unusual preponderance of dissaranged text. No hurry. These things happen. We came here to settle the matter of escaped wildlife. Remember? I have not forgotten. Thank you, everyone, for your lexical...

Throg inspects the door. Solid wood in worn but not ruined condition. It doesn't appear to be locked or to have any traps. Nothing can be heard behind the door.

Feeling unsafe, Ward attempts to shield himself with his shotgun and bicycle wheel while hoping the others can mount a successful attack this turn.

I don't think you missed anything. It was the only direction anyone had so much as suggested going and no one else was posting anything, so I wanted to move things along. If you'd rather go somewhere else, that's still a possibility. Basically all but the very last turn would have been necessary...

The card game? I've played it a few times. It's fun.

Dorgath fails to locate any traps or secret doors in the temple chamber. Since no one seems to have any objections, the party goes with Dorgath to check out the northern door in the mummy's lair. The journey is uneventful. Kelgar seems to have trouble getting his healing powers to work, but...

If the E can be captured, since we have a nice spot between P and D for it, that means we can use our J and A to demonstrate that the tiles have really only "japed" around with us this whole time. That should bring their morale down. If an N and O can be captured, Ward will attempt to use the B...

I cannot make anything useful yet. Try capturing the "T" and we can give the remaining tiles a serious "jolt." Or if we can get even more, Ward could really use a "larynx" to go with his piehole...

Ward grabs the king's men. Firstly, "piehole" is in the dictionary. It dates back to the eighteenth century as a term for an eyelet, usually in leather or cloth. The word was later used to refer to the mouth. Secondly, letters are not animals. Who ever heard of using nets to catch letters? The...

Careful, everyone. These letters are not to be trifled with. I do not recognize this particular font, so it may be difficult to ascertain their weakness... No, McGill! "Violin" doesn't even have an "H" in it. You're going to get yourself killed. Sophia, I forget, how do blank tiles... Ward...

And with one post, Melkor's character has become ten times as badass.