Maraud vs. Volrath's Bane: Tournament Rnd 2

V

Volraths_bane

Guest
DAMN IT.....can't one day go by where i don't get kciked in the groin..JUST ONE!!!!

At this point my crotch is almost impervious to pain,...but not quite

OWWWWWWWWWW

I hate to do this but GOAR!!!!!!

Maruad goes through his own surfboard and is down on the ground. VB hog ties him with Nameilus's spine..cutting into his wrists and ankle, making sure to keep ahold of the end so Maraud doesn't get ahold of it, and starts beating him over the head with a lead bunny.
 
M

menolikeygurus

Guest
STOP WITH THE GROIN SHOTS...its making MY groin hurt!

P.S...i'm the new hot dog guy!

"HOT DOGS GET YOUR HOT DOGS HERE...GET THEM WHILE THEYRE KINDA WARM BUT NOT REALLY! JEBUS....DONT HURT ME....STEP AWAY...I MEAN IT...WANT A HOT DOG?....PLEASE! DONT MAKE ME HURT YOU!"

WHACK!...hot dog to the face...

anyway...back to the fight...

someone is kicking someone else in the nuts and the other person is hurting...please continue...
 
D

Darkstar

Guest
: Gets up and prepares for the ultimate counter attack!
He pulls out radio and blasts a deafening song into everybodies ears....

Kay-kiokio-hoo
Kay-kio-kio-cowboy, cowboy, cowboy,
under the moon.

I was ridin' my horse
by the rio grandee
and all o' them coyotes singing
in a prarie symphony

I was ridin' my horse
down by the rio grandee
when i seen me a cowboy, cowboy, cowboy,
ridin' toward me

Kay-kiokio cowboy
kay-kiokio-hoo
kay-kiokio cowboy, cowboy, cowboy,
under he moon

Its the damn cowboy sonfg by hawaiian mage!
Muhahahahaha

Darkstar sits back in delight and feasts upon his salty treats!
 
M

maraud234

Guest
*Volrath's Bane is in pain from the terrible, killer song that won't go away. Maraud takes advantage of this.*

*wriggles out*

And then kicks the radio, wait did I say that outloud?

C'mon V.B., let's kick the radio together.

*kicks radio*
 
V

Volraths_bane

Guest
*VB..seeing a way to fix both problems, pcisk up the radio, and smashes it over Darkstars head*

This is OUR battle...no jumping in or i will call Jebus!!

*VB then quickly turns and slams the remains of the radio into Marauds head he then starts singing the most annoying song while whipping and panning Maruad repeatedly*

I'm blue dadadee dadada dadade dadada....

*VB wraps the spine around Mauron's leg and uses it for leverage as he goes for the pin....*

1....2.....
 
M

maraud234

Guest
*grabs the spine, and yanks it really hard, forcing V.B. off of me.*

Maraud show no mercy!!!

*kicks V.B.'s kneecap, forcing him to kneel, then Maraud places a knee at high speeds into V.B.'s face, making him sprawl on his back.*

I then jump up and down on V.B.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA
 
V

Volraths_bane

Guest
OW OW OW OW OW!!!!

*Vb puts his hands up catches MArauds foot and yanks, flipping maraud backwards.*

*Maruad manages to land precariously on his feet, but before he can steady himself, Vb slides across the floor and does a back hand Bed Pan to the back of Mauron's knees, nailing the tendon. Driving Maraud to his knees.*

*Vb gets to his feet and place kicks the crouching Maruad in the face, sending him flying sideways onto his back. VB then takes the bad pan and surpisingly stomps it on one side. He then picks up the partially cruched and now very sharp and jagged bed pan.*

A little inspiration from Nameilus!!!!!

*VB advances on the fallen and injured Maurad with a Razor sharp jagged baed Pan in one hand, a razor sharp metal spine in the other, and a lead bunny at his hip.*

Now we get serious, now we enter endgame
 
D

Darkstar

Guest
: Sobs from his broken walkman lying mangled on the floor, then runs away to a taco bell to eat his depression out of his system!
 
M

maraud234

Guest
What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do?

Oh, I know.

*Puts on his acme rocket-skates and charges V.B., hitting him in the gut. V.B. stabs Maraud with his two weapons. But Maraud's blood squirts in V.B.'s eyes.*

Ah ha.

*V.B. then says something really profound........"I can't see" Maraud takes advantage of the situation to kick V.B.'s arse.*

I really don't want to go into details, but somehow V.B. ends up standing on his head in horse chit.

MWAHAHAHAHAHA
 
V

Volraths_bane

Guest
What the hell is chit....I will assume you mean poop and continue......

NO ONE BEFOWLS THE KEEPER OF THE BED PAN!!!!! (that's an ironic statement ain't it ;) )

*Vb gets up, and uses the Bed Pans only power to vaporize the poo on him (that power doesn't seem so dumb now does it?)*

*VB approaches, whipping the spine to hold back Maruad, and then belts it, grabbing the lead rabbit he jumps into the air swinging it down on an arc backhanded. Maruad jusr barely dodges the blow, but that was the PLAN!!! VB lands still spinning from the backhand with the Razor sharp bed pan in the other hand!! He takes Maruad in the back of the knee, completely severing the tendon, and then double back with the lead rabbit, crushing his other knee's cap.*

YOUR FATE IS SEALED

*Maraud is on the ground...his knee's wasted, as VB attaches the lead bunny to the end of the spine and uses it as a flail....swinging it above his head and bringing down on poor Maruad*
 
M

menolikeygurus

Guest
referee: Wait! theres an obstruction on the field...

: darkstar shows up i a massive truck :

ds:I'm gonna get whoever broke my walkman!!!

then vb and maraud turn their attention at darkstar as he realizes the consequences of his actions...
 
D

Darkstar

Guest
: tries to flee in his truck of doom, but it fails countless times and darkstar is beated to a pulp by the two combatants while menolikeygurus sits back with his peanuts of salty pleasure and chuckles in delight!

Darkstar then wiggles out of the mass of muscle and limbs and stammers toward menolikeygurus. In awe, menolikeygurus braces for a bitch slap administered by darkstar. Darkstar then grabs whats left of his beloved peanuts and slumps in the corner munching away frantically as he is low on nutrients.
 
V

Volraths_bane

Guest
GOD DAMN IT!!!!!!!!!

Post here but do NOT interrupt with the flow of the match.

Ignore their posts...the fight goes on from My last post.

Sorry...but posting funny stuff is one thing....but pulling people out of the match is another
 
M

maraud234

Guest
*punches (enter intruders names here) in the face*

Alright, let's go. I'm about to get hit with something, I forgot what it was and I don't feel like going back to find out what it was. Anyways.......

*Maraud rolls towards Dementia. Knocking him off his feet. Maraud then punches V.B.*

I'm going to take this time to propse conditions for winning.
1) If you don't post after 3 days, you lose.
2) If you give up, you lose.
 
J

JEBUS

Guest
*wanders back in the arena, sees that the peanut vender is back, and bitchin about his walk man*

fool, I will crush you!!!

*walks over and takes package of hot dogs from meno and shoves them down Darkstar's throat*

Do you like your hot dogs boiled?

ds: *nods*

ok

*uses his magic that he decides that he has and makes a giant pot of boiling water appear*

some like it hot... some like it cold... some like it in the pot BOILING TO THEIR DEATHS!!!

*throws darkstar in the boiling water and bolts the lid on the pot*

now lets see you sell popcorn
 
M

menolikeygurus

Guest
sorry vb....

anyway...as i recover from that sorry slap I get up and see darkstar wallowing in the boiling water...
WHACK..DONT YOU EVER BITCH SLAP ME...WHACK

He's all urs Jebus...

HOT DOGS..GET YOUR HOT DOGS HERE!!!
 
J

JEBUS

Guest
I'm glad to see I have your permission to kick the crap out of some one.

*grumbles, considers adding meno to the soup*

Naw, meno isn't that annoying.

*turns up the heat on the pot*

who wants hot dogs?
 
M

menolikeygurus

Guest
I wasnt giving you permission, only saying that I was through with him...

HOT DOGS $200000, COME AND GET EM!
 
V

Volraths_bane

Guest
I accept your proposal!!!

*The rolling Maraud is distracted by the bizarre goings on in the back of the arean. VB gets up nursing a bruised ankle and grabs Maruad.*

BATH TIME MAURON!!!!!!!

*He walks over to the pot. Seeing that the hot dogs are cooked Jebus removes Darkstar and VB chucks Maraud in.*

IS HE SOUP YET?
 
J

JEBUS

Guest
*opens the pot and adds the veggies*

We got 30 more minutes until the soup is ready.

*stirs the pot with his cross some more*

anyone one want to add anything to this soup?
 
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